Mary

Health Interests

bipolar disorder,  mental health,  aging

Drugs I am Taking

Mary has not shared any drug information.

About Me

Hi, all!

I'm seventy years young and have lived with bipolar since my mid-thirties.

My illness has been the instrument of learning more about myself, about compassion for others and a greater deepening of my spiritual life. What began as a ghastly secret is now a nuisance I live with.

In the beginning my manic breaks lasted perhaps a week, and I struggled to return to sanity the way a drowning person struggles for something to hold onto, for just a breath of air.

My doctor put me on lithium back in the '70's. I learned to live with tremors and began drinking gallons of iced tea. My husband left practically upon hearing the diagnosis. Out of sheer necessity, I began working as a receptionist to help support my two young boys.

Thankfully I never had another severe manic episode, although I had my share of frantic midnight housecleanings. That doesn't happen anymore. I learned to take enough "mental health days" when I worked to defuse the build-up of emotional "junk". I have found that talk therapy is for me probably as important as drugs.

My doctor permits me to use Neurontin (off-label) which covers my bipolar as well as pretty serious peripheral neuropathy. I had extensive neurosurgery on a severe back condition in '96 , which left me with some nerve damage.

I had to stop working, but, thanks be to God, my last child was just eighteen and I no longer had to worry about supporting anyone except myself. I get Social Security and alimony. I am taking an online course in medical transcription, which is a job I can do from home. The worst of it is learning all I need to know about the computer! I feel like a stupid old lady!!

A family problem has just come up which left me with depression------so now I am taking Cymbalta. It is great medication for me. Neither Imipramine nor Effexor worked for me in the past, so I'm so grateful for Cymbalta!

I'm in a wheelchair because of my back problem and sever osteoporosis. However, that doesn't stop me from doing what I really want to do. I am about to paint my bedroom to set off my new bedspread.

I also would urge any bipolar to get a pet. I dearly love animals. My little cocker spaniel is my dearest companion. She doesn't mind that I'm bipolar.

I hope the fact that I have lived nearly forty years as a bipolar, and that I don't think that it ruined my life, will help someone. I am still learning about myself and my illness. I can't imagine not being who I am. My best advice is this: Beyond a certain discipline, be gentle with yourself! Learn to love who you are!