I was diagnosed bipolar approximately 10 years ago. The last time I was manic was two months ago. I love the mania but I hate crashing. I'm at a place in life where I don't want to be happy or depressed. I just want to be at peace. I really don't trust being happy because I'm never sure if it's true happiness or the beginning of hypomania or full blown mania. I'm not sure if this makes sense but that's where I am.
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