23 yrs and diagnosed is there anyone like me? Is bipolar a gift?

    I am 23 yrs old and a female. I have read quite a few books on bipolar but none portray the intence cycling or emotions that I suffer from. I have cycled so fast and for so long that I don't know what is me anymore. I found out a year ago when anti-depressants made me go crazy. I'm talking about mania x10. I lost 30lbs and became an insomniac. I ended up being so violent and distorted in thought that it took about 6 months to cool me down.

     People tell me that I am different that I am special. They say that I have a lot of potential, but I wonder if it is only the mania and the bipolar. I look at the celebrities that have had bipolar and as amazing as they were they were also desturbed people. Some commited suicide others did drugs and vangough cut off his ear. I am not inspired. I don't know anyone with bipolar and am surrounded by people that don't even want to believe in this illness. So far this does not seem to be a gift.

     Does anyone around my age have this?