Will I ever belong?

I've been having a great time in my professional association. There's nothing like spending time with people who love to help others blossom. And it gives me such a high to work with top notch people on great projects.

My husband and I have been involved for most of a decade in one of the major mental health organizations. Every year we train people to live more successfully with their mentally ill relatives (we have two relatives disabled by mental illness). Every couple of years, we get invited to a reception or lunch recognizing volunteers.

But as for help with our own lives -- the part where I try to handle bipolar and my job and the ordinary life of an ordinary family with aging parents and siblings too far away -- well, the support groups aren't designed for that. They're designed for the ones who are disabled by their mental illness and for their relatives. I suppose it might help during our rare times of crisis.

So I checked out the support group sponsored by another organization. There, I heard working people advised to "take all the time they needed" away from their job to deal with a mental health crisis. And I thought ... no wonder the few working people in this room are almost all self-employed. Because I lost a corporate job after only three business days (six days total) in a psych hospital, which is pretty much a record around here for getting out after an involuntary commitment. If you can't get through it quickly-even if you can get through it quickly-you've got a problem explaining yourself at work.

The other organization doesn't have a support group locally. But they do have lots of government-funded programs for people disabled by their illnesses ... and workshops on things like stress ... and at those workshops they say they won't be talking about things like bipolar disorder because that's a serious and persistent mental illness.

I'm really energized to see three responses in less than 12 hours to my first post. I know there are millions of Ladies and Gentlemen Behind Masks who don't find a home in the existing support groups and discussion threads. I hope this can prove a fruitful place for discussing how we live as stigmatized people with gifts, talents, skills, and value to the world-and how we hide our stigma well enough to continue being contributors.

Best to all,

The Lady Behind the Mask