Somedays nothing goes right, but some things do

This was an up and down day. Went to my back Dr., for my herniated disk, thinking we were going to schedule surgery, but no. He's got a bad bedside manner and forgets our previous conversations about how I have to have the surgery before the end of the year, or I won't be able to afford it (because of insurance). I left crying. He even has to MAIL me my disabled parking form (for a disabled parking placard), instead of taking a minute and filling it out right when I was there, so I could have it as soon as possible. Now I don't know when I am having surgery, which screws everything up for me. I insisted to the office staff to schedule an appt. in one month, instead of two, like the Dr. wanted. At that appt. I'm taking my husband and we are going to insist that we get that surgery scheduled. I'm so sick of Dr.'s. Also, I've been wanting to get off Abilify because of the fatigue problem, and my regular Dr. insisted that I first try taking 1/2 doses. Does any Dr. listen to me? I am really trying to speak up for myself, but it is not working. It makes me feel so weak to have no one taking me seriously. My back Dr. is going to be in for it the next time I see him, I am so angry. I just want to cry. I am so tired of being in pain from my herniated disk, I just want to take about 10 pain pills so I can have at least a little bit of time without pain. I was upset and lonely after the disappointing back Dr. appt. and had to go to the bar to find an ear to bend about how upset I was. I had one drink and came home. At least someone was willing to listen to me, and that helped. It's been kind of a crappy day. Sewing helps to keep my mind busy, so I decide to work on my sewing project (I'm making vintage style aprons from 1950's Vogue patterns). I'm sewing along thinking, "I've finally found something that I enjoy and I am good at it," when I discover that I've sewn the pieces to the wrong sides of the fabric. Ugh! And I'd felt so proud of myself for sewing so well... I don't have the heart to keep on sewing tonight. I'll have to pick it back up tomorrow. Somedays, are harder than others. Tomorrow I am sleeping in as long as I want.