Hey Nutter,

I can't stress it enough to not concentrate on the label (bipolar and borderline) and to focus more on how to better manage your illness. You mentioned never having a normal thought again...define normal. As to your husband accepting the diagnoses? It really hard on our significant others to have to put up with our crap the majority of the time. We tend to focus on whats going on with us and not see the impact of what its like in their shoes.

Your husband like many others before him does not want you labeled crazy and taking medications that would change you. Simple as that! The other part of the equation is not being able to fix things...he can't aka fix you and fears that you are going to come to a rational thought and leave him which you have already mentioned.

Give us some reasons why you would want to walk away now. By all means...if your in a abusive or controlling relationship...walk, but if it is a moot point of he dosen't understand you right how... then heck, you don't even understand yourself right now.

Sometimes I feel its actually harder on the people around us to see us this way verses the impact its having on us dealing with it. If these are your true friends, the last thing you need is to avoid due to embarrassment. The other thing to stay away from is only talking about the illness and yourself in all conversations....it gets old.

You will pull through with the help of your therapist if they have any training at all. Don't make any major life changing events until you have been in treatment for awhile and make sure to be honest with your pdoc and therapist. Concentrate on things you have control over that you would like to change to make your life more manageable.