Hi Catie

It takes time for mood stabilizing medication such as lithium to take effect. It is not really intended to act as an antidepressant but, over time, to help stabilize mood. In so doing it may help prevent the incidence of depression or the worst of its effects. It is also one of the most recognized and effective treatments for hypomania and mania.

I think it's a shame you took yourself off lithium as I don't really think you've given it a fair trial. All the evidence from medicine and from people who live with bipolar points to it as a process. If you engage with the process you will find after time things will settle down a little. It may require some changes to medication and some of these may be more successful than others. Coming off meds when you are predisposed to bipolar depression isn't a good idea. Your question regarding whether or not you relapsed is incidental. In my view a far more pressing issue would be to re-establish a dialogue with your doctor and restart your treatment.