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Saturday, September 19, 2009 Baffled by bones, Community Member, asks

Q: I am the mother of a bipolar 22 year-old daughter who is in denial. She has had three in-patient

admissions, and seems hypomanic.  I am on her s--- list, as I have accepted her diagnosis.  She is extremely irritable and has sent me scathing messages that are painful.  We are currently undergoing a disconnection.  I have a hard time receiving her purges and am feeling like a dumping ground.  I know she harbors bitterness, and am glad that she releases the pressure, but feel that she is in an unhealthy place.  What should my course of action be? 

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Answers (1)
John McManamy, Health Guide
9/23/09 3:16am

Hi, Bones. I vividly recall giving a talk and a parent asking me nearly the exact same question. I had no answer and I still don't. I have listened to many parents, and I can feel their sense of powerlessness and frustration. I know you are at the end of your rope.

 

When bipolar is raging, an individual is literally beyond reason. Thus, it is impossible to reason with that individual. At the same time, you cannot turn your back. Bad things happen when bipolar is raging. I've heard the stories and experienced some of the consequences myself.

 

In all probability, your daughter will have to fall hard before she finally accepts the inevitable and realizes she has an illness that requires treatment. Hopefully, the bottom won't result in serious injury or the criminal justice system or some other disaster.

 

In the meantime, you have to look after yourself. The stress and worry can wear you down into depression, in which case you are not good to anyone.

 

I so wish I had an answer. Please accept my understanding, instead ...

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KELLY, Community Member
10/18/09 1:57am

DONT GIVE UP AND SHE WILL COME TO EXCEPTANCE CALL YOUR LOACAL MENTAL HEALTH DEPARTMENT AND GET HER A INTERVIEW SHE WELL GET MUCH MORE RESOURCE HELP IF THEY FIND HER EXCEPTABLE BEEN THERE I KNOW IT IS HARD JOIN NAMI GOOD LUCK

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By Baffled by bones, Community Member— Last Modified: 12/11/10, First Published: 09/19/09