Hi, Rocsan. You have two very good answers to your post. What I can add is this:

No med will return you to where you were before everything hit the fan, but the right med will help you deal with your anguish and emotion. In the right dose, a med like Depakote can slow your racing mind down just enough so you don't feel overwhelmed by events. A psychologist put it to me this way: You're like the pitcher in the movie Bull Durham with the 100 MPH fastball but who keeps beaning the mascot. You want to slow down that fastball so the pitcher has control but not so he is pitching at 50 MPH.

You may feel sluggish at first as your body adjusts to the med. But if the feeling persists, you need to talk to your pdoc about lowering the dose.

Also, Depakote is a notorious weight-gainer. It's advisable to switch to no-fat/low-fat alternatives right now. Also low-sugar/low-carb substitutes.

If you don't feel the med is working for you, please let your pdoc know rather than just quitting the med. Then you can discuss the possibility of a different dose or a different med.