How can you support someone who is bipolar/depressed when they reject your relationship?

Until recently I had a very close, though long distance, relationship with a wonderful person who is bipolar. Within about six months from the time he and I got involved, he was experiencing episodes of depression and difficult med changes which may be due to the fact that he has had and continues to have enormous stressors in his life--he is going through a very difficult divorce with relatively young children involved and he has been unable to find a job for over a year.

Just when I thought he would rely on our relationship more (I had always been very supportive of him and we had been able to talk about anything and everything), he announced via e-mail that he didn't want anything to do with me--that he now understood that our relationship was not what "he needed"--that even if a relationship between us was possible, that he is so depleted, "it would be the worse thing that could happen". Before this correpondence, he had disappeared on me before----again, his marriage was disintegrating and he had lost his job and couldn't find another one. He used very negative catastrophizing language ("distorted thoughts") in the e-mails when he indicated that our relationship was over--lots of "never" and can't have any hope about us because it was all an illusion and that so much of his life had all been an illusion, that we couldn't even be friends because he didn't think he had anything to offer me, that it could never work with us because he would end up feeling smothered and would resent me, and that he can't depend on anyone or have anyone depend on him. He even said he didn't know who he was anymore.

I realize that what he is going through is taking all of his energy and that it won't be resolved any time soon, that he is also suffering from guilt and self-doubt---but it's been months and he still won't have anything to do with me.

As far as I know, he is taking medication and is in therapy. I can't help but feel that he is deeply depressed and overwhelmed and that those are the reasons he has completely rejected even the thought of any relationship with when other things resolve themselves.

He recently responded to a written request to get together 'with an old friend' by writing back that there are "no old friends here anymore."

I am very worried about him--but it's obvious that any contact with him causes him more anxiety--instead of being a comfort to him. There doesn't seem to be any way I can offer any support to him at all--and that is very sad.  I realize he is at a cross-roads in his life and that he needs to figure things out on his own. I simply wanted to be supportive.

So I am wondering whether I should simply take his comments at face value--or continue to hope that when things settle down and he is not overwhelmed and depressed, he will want to reestablish contact? Should I try to reach out to him every couple of months or so? What is the best way to do this so that I don't create more axiety in his life--but that I offer support?
 

Any thoughts--

Thank