Jenn, I met someone in Dec 2011, I remember the exact day. I am 31, never married, use to be a party person, I was a musician, toured the world. I say musician, because one day I woke up and said this is not the life I want anymore and made changes, started studying the bible and I have changed everything for the positive as to who I am. At least so i thought. As i said met this girl in Dec, talked for a while, then started dating in Feb. The way we met is she started attending the same bible meetings and wanted to change her life. Needless to say, it has been a tornado, I never knew she was bipolar and was a binge drinker. one week after dating her I am picking her up from a guys house that was just a guy "friend", she promised not to drink again. Four weeks later, I notice she is on the phone alot more texting with giggles like a little girl. The next week we go to meet her long time girl friend and gets up to use the restroom with her, she had 4 shots of vodka, that night turned into one of the top 5 most horrible nights of my life. She tried to get that guy friend to come get her, I spoke with him and he said when I said I was her bf, "what boyfriend". Next day her and I talk, she was so sorry, and we decided to work things out. The next night she comes to my house to watch a movie, she had a monster drink which she lived on (i thought was strange), after the movie she says she wants to drink, I told her lets call it a night. She was set on drinking. That night ended in her telling me to make love to her after a 4 hour talk of me trying to reason with her, then right after making love she flips out on me telling me to leave and how could you do that. The next day I go to see her in the morning, I said this stuff can happen anymore. She says get in the car, go get gas with me and smoke a cig, and continue the day having fun. I said no, I am not going to live that life. She has been in a heavily drunken binge since last monday. Found out the guy was more then a friend, they are getting married. Talked to her on friday, she said she is getting beat by him for me to come save her, I started to drive without her knowing to get her, got there and it was all a lie. She has been in a Manic phase, drinking extremly heavy every day, he is giving her the booze. When I left, she ran to me and said tel me to get in the car, I will never look back, I told her to tell him and lets go. She called me a liar to him. That was last friday, sat her long time girl friend goes to see her and pick her up, she was wasted and out of control and refused to go because she doesnt have me and that guy will care for her, her backup plan. She also started cutting again. When I went up there I said to the guy, do you know she is a major alcoholic and bipolar, she hadnt been taking her pills. Last week I have did so much research on bipolar disorder, and understand all the signs that she showed now. He said he knew what he was doing. Also the parents said she was diagnosed years ago Bipolar 1, I was told by her she just had some dipression issues. This is the very short version of the past 2 months, it has been a blur. I called the police to check on her yesterday, told them what was going on and said I have all text saved saying she wants to die, she is cutting he is hitting her, that she wants to leave. I dont know whats true or illusion. The dispatcher asked if I want to know what they find when they get there, I said no. I am done. The reason I am writting in her is, on sat I was reading this, got on my computer this morning and finished reading all your replys. I tried to save her, thinking I could help. She doesnt see she has any problems. Maybe she loved me, maybe she didnt, but I do know I love myself to much. I think there is hope in everyone, no one is broke. But unless someone wants it, doesnt matter how much you help. Dont lose yourself and what you believe, dont stay if they dont want to really control things. I would of stuck by her side, but how much was a facade? I will never know, and I am fine with that. Was it all Bipolar? probably not. Now I am doing a self exam, why I stayed from the first time which was 2 days after we started dating? I will never do this again and urge all of you to walk away if the person does not want to manage themself.