I realize how hard it really is.  My oldest son drinks,  (he is 35) and I kept taking him back over and over again.  He kept promising to quit and get a job, but it never happened.  He was verbally abusive, and I felt like a prizoner in my own home.  As mothers, we think it's our responsibily to always be there for our children.  But there comes a time when they have to take on that roll for themselves.  Now it falls down to what kind of life you want to live. I suggest you call him (or text) and ask him whats going on.  If he can't be honest with you about whats going on in his life, then he's not ready to make any changes.  The first rule for any family member with a bipolar person in their family...is to protect themselves.  Plain and simple.  All the I promises don't mean anything unless we follow through. You have some really hard decisions to make, BUT don't make them with your HEART.  Let me know how things are going...heres a BIG HUG for you!