Wednesday, April 29, 2009 grace68 asks

Q: is bipolar depression acceptable reason for giving job up?

i am in a nightmare situation, i am completely overwhelmed by a depressive episode-there is no way i can work in my new nursing job (that i took on when i was hypo-manic)

we need the money, but i just can't face ever going back to it.

i have struggled with bipolar all my life, and i am just so tired of it. i had many long term sick in previous employment, and they were ok- but every time it was just such a huge struggle to start over. this being a new employment, i just feel like i've blown it. when i applied for the job, i was off-meds and feeling so well, i was in denial about bipolar, so i never mentioned it. so i'm probably in big trouble too. i can't face actually talking to my employer, i'm unable to talk just now anyway, i've completely withdrawn and won't answer the phone or go out. i just want to send in a letter of resignation, and accept the fact that i will have to pay them back for too much annual leave taken and also sick pay. it's like a great big huge cloud over me- i need to sort it out, but i can't- it's a nightmare.

does anyone out there think i am reasonable to give my career up at this stage- i am only 41, but bipoar is so disabling.

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Answers (3)

John McManamy, Health Guide

4/30/09 10:50pm

Hi, Grace. In the course of one question, you went from asking about giving up your job to asking about giving up your career.

Whoah there!

Yes, you are overwhelmed right now. Yes, maybe you shouldn't have taken on this new job ...

But emphatic no, you are 41 and way too young to give up on yourself.

You very accurately noted to the effect that once you're out of circulation it is very difficult to get back in. Most true. We get trapped in our own insecurities. We turn our back on life and become miserable. Depression begats itself.

From what I gather, you need to take care of your depression right now, even if it means losing your job. Keep in mind that although depression sucks, psychic healing can take place. Give yourself time and space for your mind to mend. Hibernate, but don't hibernate forever.

Also, you are extremely fortunate to be in a profession where there will always be a demand for your services, even in this economy. Take the time you need to heal. At the right time, the right position will open up.

Your depression is doing the talking for your brain right now, and that's okay. But just file away that you will be back. You're a nurse. You're smart. You know how to take care of yourself. Trust in the healing process ...

Thrasher

4/30/09 9:14am

I totally understand that feeling of being overwhelmed. when i am high there is not enough for me to do at work. and then when i am down i cannot look at people in the eye, and it is the hardest thing to get to work. sometimes all i want to do is hide under the covers. i feel like i cant deal. i would tell your employer. when i took my job i didnt tell them. i eventually told them because i was having bad anxiety. they understand when i need to take time off. good luck

linus1

5/ 1/09 11:32am

I'm 55 yo and have also struggled with bipolar most of my life and have worked in the medical field off and on since age 16. When I was in my early 20's I went and joined the USAF during a manic episode. My husband and doctors had to intervine to get me out of it... You know from past experience that these episodes really do pass and life can be pretty good. Obviously you are high functioning or you wouldn't be a nurse. What to do? First things first...talk with your doctor, get your meds adjusted, and for goodness sake...TAKE your meds! One of our (bipolars) biggest problems is being med complient. It helps a great deal to get involved in a support group. It also helps to be honest with your employer. You may not get a job because you're honest about needing extra time off but that's ok...there is another job out there!!! I no longer work and am on disability for a variety of reasons but I know from experience that there are employers who are willing to work with our limitations. I wish you well, Grace, and I know you can weather this rough patch...

Q: is bipolar depression acceptable reason for giving job up?

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