I am bipolar and ADHD and 45 years old. My wife of 8.5 years finally has had enough. I am verberally abusive at times and have a gambling addiction. I don't cheat, no drugs or alcohol. I have explosive disorder as well, I have never hit her or anyone else. I have gone to every appointment with my DR. and takes my meds like clockwork. I am not getting any better. I was not diagnosed until 3 years ago but I have been like this ever since I can remember. When I am good I am real good, she is my fourth wife. I left the previous 3, GOD BLESS THEM for putting up with me. A future without my wife will be awful. I love her with all my heart and she has been my savior and now I have thrown it all away. I have tried prozac, topomax abilify, depakote, lamictal, seroquel nothing has seemed to work. What can I do, I would like to show her I can be the person she sees when I am not the monster. Any different treatment advice or new meds that might help. I thank you for your advice.
Q: My wife left she had too much, how can I get her back?
we all have to find a way to like ourselves, before anyone else
can like us. Pills can only do so much. They probably are helping
but you need more, like a social worker, or support group.
to find ways to not explode . Do this for yourself, not just
for her. Before youre ready to explode , pick up the phone,
and call a toll free mental health line and tell them how you
feel and why. yell at them , instead of someone else.
by the time you call back, you ll get a different worker
anyways. when you feel more stable, write your wife a letter,
being honest about everything, once every few weeks. this
will help you. and by all means, make sure ya go to
gamblers anonymous, noone else wil understand about your
gambling.
speaking as someone who was in your situation, but the roles were reversed, get help with your addiction first..try cognitive behavior therapy, just going to your doc is not enough, they dont have the time to "work" with you, they basically (talking about pdocs) are trying to tweak your meds, and keep you stable, but you need behavior therapy to unlearn these behaviors, you have to find your wise mind, and not just your emotional mind..you have to learn to how to act and behave, not only reacting to your emotions, try cbt, dbt, and if these options are not open to you, try finding a support group. i hope that helps, the dbt/cbt really helped me, i still feel the rage, i just know that is a feeling that i am in control of, and i use my wise mind to deal with the situation.iam truly sorry about your wife, work on you, show her your changing..give her something tangible, no promises, actions. good luck.,
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