I have a husband that is two different people. One hour he is kind and helpful. If I say anything he doesn't like, he accuses me of lecturing or critisizing him and gets angry, swears and name calls and goes into a rage. When he talks about people he does not like, he gets so worked up, he yells trying to tell me his feelings. If someone says something he does not like, he imediately cuts them down, name calls, and gets violent. The next day he is appologizing for his swearing, violent manners, and name calling. He verbally abuses me all the time. I try to reassure him that I love him and care about him, and show my concern. He keeps saying he needs space. He was single for many years, and liked our relationship when we were dating. He has told me he should not have gotten married. He pouts all the time, which can go on for a entire day. I try not to allow him to upset me, but he just acts very mean towards me. Swears and carries on about the most ridiculous things. He acts like a child. He will actually break down and cry, when he realizes how awful he treated me.....this does not happen for a day or two after his mean day. I have tried everything, and said he needs to go to his doctor. He will never let me go with him. He is always telling me that he has a hard time dealing with me. Sometimes I have no clue what he is referring to, and I ask him to explain to me what is wrong and he just tells me no. It can be so frustrating, and I am having a real time dealing with this man and his different personalities. Is this a sign of some kind of drug abuse. He smokes cigarettes, and always goes out to the garage to smoke. Sometimes it can take him 10 minutes before he comes in from smoking, and at times it seems that when he comes back in from smoking, he can be totally different.
I would appreciate some type of imput. Thanks for your assistance. I am deseparate, for I have fibromyalgia, and am suppose to eliminate stress from my life. He makes a lot of stress for me to deal with on a daily basis, and seems to like it when he can see that I am getting upset. He then turns around and accuses me of being upset, and tells me to settle down. It is one mind game after another with him. He also has a real hard time with his memory. He forgets things sometimes within minutes of when he heard the information. I will tell him things, and he tells me I did not tell him, when he forgot!
Thanks for your help.