Monday, October 22, 2007
today i meet with my surgeon to discusses my findings this far and prepare for a lumpectomy the next day. Right now i don't no much and not sure what my treatment outcome will be so naturally i'm scared to death. I have an identical twin sister and this is very difficult for her. we are turning 50 Dec.26. I pray all goes well i just became a grandmother for the first time a grandson named Noah he's going to be my holistic treatment i feel great when i see him.
my b-day is dec. 26, too. I wil be 34 yrs old.I got lumpectomy done on 10/9 and i am gona go see oncologist today for chem.
i am gona be so sick on my b-day. I cried so much first week , i told myself I don't want to cry cuz, i am still here and alive. but last ngt i broke down and cried agian. I am scard to death too. i kept thinking what if this tumor comes back all over body, am i gona die, there's just so much thoughts all over mind. i kept telling myself that i am gona get haircut but I've been delaying for 2 weeks. I will get it cut tomo. you will be fine and i wil be fine. at least we are saving our breast. i feel so lucky and bless about that. I am reading a book called "why i wore lipstick to my mastectomy" and it is really inspring and funny. whenever you need to cry,let it out.
good luck
jessica