I'm angry and frustrated. I was diagnosed in November 2008 with ductal breast cancer. We thought I would just have the partial mastectomy, be off 4 weeks and then go back to work. Surprise!! Breast cancer is running my life. I'm waiting for doctors, scheduling a double mastectomy and trying to keep myself positive. I miss working every day. I'm a planner and this limbo crap is horrible. Help!? I know this has to get better. I'm a control freak and this is way out of my norm.
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Breast Cancer Sucks!
1/ 6/09 10:10pm
Hello, I know exactly how you feel. It feels like your life is on pause for a minute. I'm 27 with 3children and work partime. I was diagnosed with breast cancer in both breast in April of 2008. I went through a total of 16 rounds of chemo no node involvement so no radiation. I had a dbl mastectomy in April and just got reconstruction in Dec. Now I just feel so much relief. Also WOW! was I strong to make it through all that. Such an emotional rollar coaster. But it's all worth it in the long run. We do what we have to for our health. I have to say I would do over and over again to have my life. I truely feel blessed to be here to tell my story. As you will too! You'll get through this it will be hard but lean on loved ones for strength and fight like a girl! Stay Strong!
1/ 7/09 12:48pm
Hi this is Stepaheda,
I am so sorry to hear that you have to go through this, but happy to hear that they caught it and you are receiving treatment, this is good news.
But I want you to know that you are not alone, we all know exactly how you feel, it is so overwhelming at first to have your life be controled by something that you can not see. But to let you know "YES" it does get better, or we just get better at dealing with it. One thing that I can tell you is that the more knowledgable you are the better for you, you know what they say knowledge is power. So I would say read, read, and do more reading on the subject of Breast Cancer. There was so much I did not know and did not understand. My surgery was July of 2008 and things are moving alone just fine, my doctors are very happy with my healing progress.
At this stage of the game, I would suggest that you step back and just take a deep breathe, and now close your eyes and breath very long and slowly, and say to your self I can do this. And you know what you will do just fine.
Please let us know how you are doing.
Best Regards,
Stepaheda
1/12/09 6:23pm
1/16/09 5:42pm
5/12/09 5:02am
Dora hang in there! My wife was diagnosed with breast cancer in December but this is not her first go a cancer... She has hodskins when she was 27 and this is a result of the radiation used to cure that..... I had bladder cancer in 04 and being a dumb guy I had ignored the problem for longer than I should have so it was no good.... but I am still here and so is my wife. Stay positive and you will be through this in no time! They have come a long way in the treatment of all forms of cancer!
Best wishes
6/24/09 3:36pm
Yes it does suck but you have to look at it differently....
I am 42 years old, single parent of a wonderful 12 year old son... when I was diagnosed with breast cancer I was devasted. I have no family and was certainly not ready to go to a higher place... I opted to have a double mastectomy right away to get it out of me as quickly as possible and I said just take anything out that doesn't look good... I then came home with drain tubes and hide them very well under sweat shirts to not scare my boy... I had 2 rounds of chemo, lost all my hair. I got lots of fun wigs and made sure to try to look my best everyday and get up so I wouldn't scare my boy. I also did 7 weeks of radiation and 10 weeks of the oxygen chamber every day. I had three boob jobs after the mastecctomy... all three failed I got fevers, felt like crap so I opted to just feel good and stuff my bras..... At first I cried , I was angry at first.
How I get thru it is I think it was a gift to me to have it instead of my son, because no matter how hard I think it is, it's not as hard as it would be if it were my son..... I'd take this desease gladly if given the choice...
That's how I get up and work and play every day of my life and live with cancer!!
Annie
Then something
12/27/09 1:40am
I am 52 years old with breast cancer. I thought I might be safe since I already have systemic lupus and rheumatoid arthritis. Wrong! I too am used to being in control. Wrong again! Once I was diagnosed I knew I needed to get this done fast because my insurance benefits at my work were being changed due to the economic crisis. The "new" coverage starts Jan 1,2010. I was very lucky to have a surgeon who was available and ready to move fast. I had the surgery (the week before my birthday. Happy Birthday to me!) and started radiation immediately. I am now finished with radiation and had my first chemo visit on Christmas eve (Not exactly the gift I had in mind when I wrote Santa) I now have to deal with all of the financial hardship that this is causing. I refuse to wear my cancer and I refuse to feel sorry for myself. I am back at work part time and plan to be there full time by the end of this next week. I am too busy to be sick! My only fear now is that it will come back. But if it does, I will be ready and know a bit more about what to expect. Unfortunately I just won't be able to afford to get treated if it does come back. I already have a problem with the fact that my insurance doesn't carry a generic for the treatment and it is not on the "list" for covered drugs. Of course not! It sucks but I need to forge on and so does anyone who has cancer. My husband died of lung cancer and so did my father. They were not as lucky as me.
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The club no one wants to belong to, that is... I'm sorry things aren't progessing more quickly for you, but this is pretty normal, this waiting. One thing you might be able to do - is your work such that you can go back while you wait? I did a lumpectomy, mastectomy, reconstruction, chemo, and radiation - the whole 9 yards - and missed very little work. You can usually work during breast cancer treatment, unless you have a job that's very physical... And if you do, then I guess, unfortunately, you DO need to take enough time for physical healing.
As for being a "control freak" - I think loosening up a bit may prove less stressful in the long run. At the end of the day, there's nothing we have guaranteed control over — except our own attitude. I'd like to suggest you read our post on control. And our post on living a less-planned life. Both are worth thinking about, as you wait for the "action" to begin....
Best of luck, Dora, and please stay in touch. We're here when you need us - PJH