I Am Not My Hair...

By MD Tuesday, September 30, 2008

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I Am Not My Hair (India Arie) is one of my favorite songs and was even before the cancer. As I sit here watching Oprah (with Christina Applegate) crying, I can't help but think of this song. Last week as I got ready for work doing my normal routine and noticed that there was significantly more hair in my comb. On Saturday as my husband and I got ready to go to dinner with some friends, I realized that a full handful of my hair was in my comb. As the week has progressed, I have noticed more and more hair and although I knew this was very likely, I guess I still wasn't ready for it. So now I have to prepare myself to lose something else I love. I know it's strange to say that you love your hair or your breasts but I'm a young woman (30) and I pride myself and looking my best so, yes, I miss my breast and yes, I'm going to miss my hair. I guess now what I have to do is remember that "I am not my hair..." This is breast cancer awareness month and I guess what I am going to do is make sure that all of my girlfriends are proactive with their health.

I sincerely appreciate all of you who have encouraged me on this journey. There have been so many kind words that I am overwhelmed and overjoyed that God has blessed me in this way. I have my second chemo treatment on Friday and a long way to go but as the days pass I am getting stronger emotionally and I'm definatley a fighter to here I go...

My baby is on the way...

Comments (4) | Add comment

Maria Gifford, Editor

10/ 1/08 1:03am

MD,

You are a beautiful woman with or without your hair or breast. It's your heart and soul that sings, and we hear it loud and clear. You're a young woman indeed, with many years yet to be lived. Hang in there -- you'll get through this.

Best of luck with your treatment. Be sure to keep us posted on how you're doing.

Sincerely,

Maria

steakprincess

10/ 1/08 1:44am

I'm right behind you. I get my first chemo on the 8th. I'm trying to tell myself that the hair is an okay thing to go, but I can't convince myself totally. I already bought a wig, but it's not the same. Some how I think my hair is a safety, comfort, sort of security blanket. You can hide your recent mastectomy stuff with clothes etc, but the hair is completely something different.

I feel for you and I know we'll both be ok and get through it.

I wish you love and strength.

Danielle

survivor823

10/ 1/08 9:08pm

I know it's hard. The most encouraging thing I can tell you is just take it day by day. For me, i'm about to turn 34 in two weeks and it's been almost two years since I was diagnosed. I just finished my final reconstruction with saline implants three weeks ago. Now I have new breasts and new hair. In fact it's better than ever. Stay strong and have faith. Remember you beautiful whether you have hair of not. Your husband and your family will love you for who you are. Just love yourself. A year from now, you'll look back and say it was just a bad thing that happened to me and move forward. And I promise it gets better. I only had four treatments of chemo and time flew. It may not seem like that now, just live one day at a time. If you need to talk I'm here! My friend and mentor use to tell me when you wake up every morning just say this little prayer. It used to help me. Dear Lord, thank you for this day, I'm getting better and better each and each and every day. Stay positive.

Nikolai

10/ 3/08 11:38am

Dont worry to much about your hair. Just think of all the short hair styles you were too afraid to try before that you'll be able to rock when it starts to grow back in again!

I Am Not My Hair...

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