Sex After A Mastectomy

sgharrison Community Member September 24, 2009
  • Hi everyone,

    My name is Sarah Harrison and I'm an editor at YourTango, a website and community for women about love and relationships. We publish reported pieces, advice and personal essays, and our members post stories about their relationships and give each other advice and support.

    With October approaching, we're looking for a woman to write a personal essay about her sex life after breast cancer and a mastectomy. The piece will answer questions like:

    How did your sexual identity change after breast cancer and mastectomy?
    Was it harder to feel sexy? If so, how did you find your sex appeal, and how long did it take?

    How did your sex life change after breast cancer and your mastectomy?
    What were your emotions the first time you had sex after your mastectomy?
    When were you able to start having sex again?
    What are the medical issues (as opposed to emotional issues) that you had to deal with?
    How did your husband or boyfriend react to your missing breast(s)?
    What advice do you have for other women who are worried about their sex lives and sexuality after breast cancer and a mastectomy?

    If you or anyone you know are interested in writing for us, please contact me via my profile.

    Thank you,

    Sarah Harrison
    Senior Editor, YourTango
    www.yourtango.com

3 Comments
  • bob
    bob
    Jun. 27, 2011

      I am 48yrs old.  I have recently met a fine woman who had a bount with breast cancer.  She had a breast removed.----How can I convince her that this doe's not concern me.  Let's face it,at 48 I'M not perfect myself.

     

      48

    • Phyllis Johnson
      Health Guide
      Jun. 27, 2011

      Bob, I assume that you have already told her that you are not worried about her health history.  A woman's body image takes such a hit after breast cancer surgery that it may take her a while to really believe you.  Your actions in spending time with her and listening to her will speak louder than any words.  When your relationship moves to greater...

      RHMLucky777

      Read More

      Bob, I assume that you have already told her that you are not worried about her health history.  A woman's body image takes such a hit after breast cancer surgery that it may take her a while to really believe you.  Your actions in spending time with her and listening to her will speak louder than any words.  When your relationship moves to greater physical intimacy, keep in mind that she has plenty of other erogenous zones besides breasts.  Depending on the type of surgery she had, she may or may not still have sensation in her breasts, so communication about what she can feel will be important.

      Your willingness to form a relationship with a breast cancer survivor speaks well for your character.  I'm sure she appreciates that even though it is taking a while to trust after what she has been through.

  • Anonymous
    lprp0620
    Oct. 01, 2009

    Hi there:

    I had a double mastectomy for bilateral breast cancer on July 2nd 2009. I have no family history of breast cancer and I am only 34 years old. As my oncologist put it "for some reason your breast tissue likes to make cancer"...yeah great!

     

    My husband is wonderful, he never made me feel like my breasts defined our relationship together. It was...

    RHMLucky777

    Read More

    Hi there:

    I had a double mastectomy for bilateral breast cancer on July 2nd 2009. I have no family history of breast cancer and I am only 34 years old. As my oncologist put it "for some reason your breast tissue likes to make cancer"...yeah great!

     

    My husband is wonderful, he never made me feel like my breasts defined our relationship together. It was very difficult for me in the beginning not only for the obvious appearance reasns but because my breasts were a big part of sexual pleasure for me.

     

    I had reconstruction with expanders at the same time as my mastectomies so waking up from surgery with some form of breast shape was comforting.

     

    If you have a partner who loves you and who is committed to you, sex after mastectomies is the same as it was before , at least in the emotional sense which is what mattered most to me.

     

    My husband always looked at it as we are gettig rid of the cancer, not just the breasts. He is right..knowing I took charge of my future and that I will be here for my kids when they are adults is very empowering and that is sexy!!

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