I have come out of my two-year cancer coma with full force. I have started a new program that takes me to school Mondays and Wednesdays and working tuesdays and thursdays. It is my secret mission for now. I feel really superstitious about it, so I don't want to say what it is just yet….
As I found my way around this huge campus on Monday, it was about 102'F, and I had to park about 7 blocks away from my class in the only parking designated for new students. I start to walk and I could feel my clothes sticking to me with sweat. I am not big on sweating, in fact when I work out, I still don’t' really sweat that much. When I finally get to class, I am soaking. I could barely concentrate because of exhaustion and dehydration, and there was only a fan in the room that was about 95'F and filled with people. I was lucky enough to get a seat.
The "new beginning" I was very excited about, was kind of ruined by the reminder that I still have some physical limitations. Trying to get a special pass to a closer parking lot proved to be just as harrowing as my walk. Going to several departments, several buildings, several wrong turns, and much more unnecessary walking, there was no way to get a pass without a doctor's note.
Today, I saw my onco and explained my dilemma and I had my whole argument ready. Even though I am better, look better and feel better, I still need this one little thing. If I could just get a pass to be closer to my class, my stamina won't be wasted on walking and I would actually have a chance to pass this course and move a head with my secret mission.
It didn't take much convincing. My onco is glad to help in anyway that would make my life a tiny bit easier after what we've been through. So, even though cancer therapy feels behind me, there are still some reminders of it here and there. Like a scab that falls off, and bleeds a bit…I still need a little more healing time. Just a little more healing time for that little cut to scab over and make a good, clean, scar. It won't be long now. I will very soon feel like I can beat myself up again. But for now, reluctantly, kid gloves are still in style.
Mammo and MRI scheduled next month for year 2 screening. Shaking in my boots, but walking in them anyway =)