Last week was the longest week of my life. knowing that I had to start school, but I was also waiting on bone scan results from the friday before. I was not really that worried, but the stress of it all happening at the same time has me a little whackado. The results were clean, no evidence of disease in my bones.

So my bone pain could just be what chemo does to your bones. Very happy that is all over. I had my results about 3 hours before I had to be in class. I have started a new program to retrain and do something else besides teaching high school.

The month was really stressful, because I was thinking of the looming bone scan. I didn't want to tell too many people, but I was a little scared. Just because of the constant pain in my back and sit bones, I thought it would be something bad. Lucky for me it wasn't--this time. 

I don't know what other thing to do...what precautions to take. I should be taking vitamins everyday, but I forget. I should , I should.

I am still working out, and running for the first time in a long time. I am not really losing weight, but I feel stronger. I still have some stamina poop-outs. I just go full throtle until I can't go anymore. Then I have to sit down, or lay down. But now it is only for about 5

minutes, and I am back on the horse!

I feel I am still recovering from something. My energy is still recovering. But on a happy note, I got my hair done with some pretty color and streaks. The rough stages of chemo hair are all gone, and it is back to normal. Although, my hairdresser says it is thicker than it used to be, so I will take that!

Bone scans are easy, but the waiting game, and going to the hospital again was rough on me. It makes my mind crazy. It makes me afraid. It makes me remember that it isn't "normal", that I still have to keep a looming eye on something that was, and that could be again.

I try very hard to not think about it now. I want to move on. I guess it is just like the scars on my body; it is a part of me now. It isn't bad, or tragic, or good...it just is. I am trying my best to deal with this.

Thank the universe it was free of any signs of cancer. So why do my bones hurt?