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A Breast Cancer Survivor's Reflections on Jessica Queller’s, Pretty is What Changes

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PJ Hamel

PJ Hamel

Sat, April 05, 2008

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Jessica Queller’s new book, Pretty is What Changes, inspired posts on this site by both me and my fellow blogger, Laura Zigman. Queller writes about undergoing genetic testing that revealed she carries the BRCA gene, which put her at a nearly 90% risk of getting breast cancer. She chose to lowe...
Anonymous
Deb
4/ 6/08 2:42pm
I loved what PJ had to say.  Being a breast cancer survivor, (I don't like that term.  We battled the ******* and we won.  We didn't just survive.) I no longer fear the monster under the bed because I have seen the monster.  It is fierce and has left us scarred and worse, but we are strong and we are powerful.  We get our power from kowledge and treatment options.  We also get our power from our sexes history of protecting our loved ones and ourselves.  We should stop warning people, women in particular, that the topic is sensitive, uncomfortable, fearsome.  Let's recognize that women have a lot more inner strength than we give ourselves credit for.  Can you tell I came of age in the 60's and 70's.
4/ 6/08 9:31pm

PJ,

 

You make such an important point.  And I'm embarrassed to say that while I heard that NPR "warning" when I listened to the interview with Queller I didn't register the meaning of it.  You're so right that the real enemy is the cancer itself, not the treatment.

 

--Laura 

4/ 9/08 12:33pm

There is an increasing debate up here in Canada about whether we protect our children too much, whether the constant focus on safety (naturally excluding things like bike helmets and seatbelts) is not doing them any favours in terms of their ability to cope with the vagaries of life. And for a while, I've been thinking that this applies to adults, as well. There is so much focus on safety - or robber, on the dangers of everyday life (sterilize that! bubble wrap this!) And I honestly believe that it is impacting our ability to cope with what happens in life. There are so many warnings about unpleasant content, things that might challenge you to think or feel that we are completely unprepared when something bad happens in our lives. I read a article a few weeks ago that said that 10% of Americans are taking antidepressants. I wonder how many of those had been prescribed antidepressants for situations in which sadness is a natural, healthy response (getting a serious diagnosis, the death of a family member, divorce, etc.). So we medicate ourselves, numb the feelings and avoid facing the darker side of life. You do that long enough, you lose your ability to bounce back.

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