My husband deserves Sainthood, if it was someones elses, they would have gone out for a beer 4 years ago and never come back. He is a construction worker, heavy labor, and he gets to come home, vacuum, take care of all the pets, help me w dinner, does the dishs, walks the dogs, washes the floors, does the laundry, food shopping, all errands, cleans entire house, never has a minute to himself and never complains, yet I take my frustrations out on him, which is so unfair, he realizes this but I am sure it still hurts, I try really hard not to but some days it is too overwhelming. I go thru periods where I cry for days, I sleep 3 hours a night for the last 3 years, so that makes me bitchy, and sex life, well that went down the toilet years ago! I saw someone mention smoking pot, my g.p. actually suggsted it last week, I told her I did try in the summer but I got really paranoid, that is why I stopped eons ago, so that is out , but she swears it helps.
I have been looking for an RSD support grp. for some time, I love in Central Jersey and unfortunately there are none, I can't even find a chat grp. on liner for it, so if anyone knows of a good one I would love the address. I think out of everything that is wrong w me, I hate that the most. I don'r know how many of u have it really badly, but appanently when u get a violent sudden onset the #1 side effect is losing your teeth in the 1st 90 days, well that is 100% true, I would bite into a piece of toast and 1/2 my tooth was there, besides that, rapid leg hair growth, at my age I haven't had to shave my legs more than once a month for years, now u can braid it!!! It is truly a horrible disease and I hate it, actually I hate everything that is wrong w me and that is my problem-denial, I refuse to accept that this is the rest of my life, that it is never going to get better, believe me, I do not feel sorry for myself, I know there are millions of people so much worse off, my own g-daughter is terminal, so I do count my blessings everyday, but u don't want to live a life like this either. To feel so useless and inept when I used to be so outgoing, I was a total hippie, I marched for civil rights, marched on Wash. against the Viet Nam war, burnt our bras in front of city hall for women's rights, I was always a fighter, now at this time I feel no fight left in me.
Well I think I went way overboard, u r probably hoping I do not post again for a long time. But I would like to hear from anyone who has RSD or a pump if u r willing to talk. Thanks for listening.
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