Lessened by one ....

Doug - yes , the randomness of life .. I have carried that around for decades .. it most certainly has meaning .. so did your friend .. sorry for your loss .. agserra

Hello Jo - while Hemingways' ended in what most deem a tragedy , it was .. we lost a person with deep convictions, and a love so much big .. but we need to learn from him .. and sadly his grand-niece , who also had such a sad view of people and life ..

So, when I read this it is to inspire me  to keep going, that if I were to disappear tomorrow , it would impact people , and I want more than that .. I want to be able to share and educate ..

Yes, I have my bouts , but I don't drink or do illicit drugs that only propel you further downward .. so even if I am who I am, and feel what I feel , it is okay .. in these words I found some comfort .. it has a dual meaning , and for me it is inspiration, as I said to keep the course , and from another quote , and I will let you all figure this out .. "I will not go gently , into that good night" ... peace - agserra

Thank you for sharing,You know I have never been a drinker.And I am not quite sure what you meant by illicit drugs.You seem to know about Hemmingways great niece is that right??? I think we both are literary people.Books have always been my escape too.Sometimes since we cannot hear the voice or see each others expression.Maybe we misinterprate the meaning.I hope I have not said anything to upset or mislead you.I find your post an inspiration for me.I find that Betty and Morgan have so much courage.I like this site.I have found friends,help,someone who will listen when all your friends and family let you down.But I really enjoy talking to you a great deal and hope I wasn't out of line with anything I said.I am going through a lot right now.And sometimes when you are going through too much it just spins you out of control.I hope you think of me as a friend.I love your picture.I have been hesitant about putting my picture in but I think now I will so everybody can put a face with the voice.I just got some great news.I am going to be a great grandmother.My daughter is 39 and she will be 40 when she turns into a grandmother.I was 36 when I became one.Well the good news is it is a girl.My daughter just called me and said how come you are always right.You always know what it is going to be.She was so excited.We usually have mostly girls from my generation.Now I have 4 grandsons and 3 granddaughters.I was at Bealls yesterday and they had a great 20% off what was already marked down to 40% off.I looked at the new borns Christmas dresses.And I always bought my older grandchildrens Easter and Chriistmas clothes.At that time my girls were new mothers and couldn't afford those expensive Christmas dresses.It gave me so much pleasure to be able to buy them for them and each Easter and Christmas I got my present and it was only what they could afford.A picture of my grand children framed in the clothes I bought.They never knew that they couldn't have given me anything I would have loved more.So now the next generation is starting their families and I hope that my old traditions will be started again anew.Today has been a good day for me.Take care and keep me updated.Thanks so much for caring....Jo

Jo - i wasn't slighted at all .. so let's just start again .. thank you for sharing with me .. and I am not an avid reader , my father was and would tell me the books he had read , and my ineterest in hemingway was because he was a curious person, an observer of people , like me ...

i hope i am not dissapointing you with that , but just being honest .. my writing comes from my heart , and when i do , it sets something in me free .. i am aphilospher my nature , and observing people , how they act in certain situations , and who they are .. my friends call me "mother" , as i am usually the one who has the right words at the right time ..

but i am genuine, when i write , i can express what it is i feel inside , and somehow that comforts me .. always did , one class i was good at ..

it is wonderful that you have a new granddaughter , i have 8 neices and nephews , though they don't keep in touch , as i sorta gave up sending emails .. have three brothers , two of whom i no longer write to either .. and  the one who does reply , well, he and used to never get along .. as we are 3 years apart in age, i being older , we came to the conclusion that together we are the middle child , of sorts ...

he also is artistic , in that we both love to sketch, play guitar and seem to be the "dreamers" of the 4 .. although my life took a totally different path than his for may years , he is now the closest ..

it is hard to explain ... but i hope you stay in touch , i am thinking we can email on this site , or if you like , just continue talking here ..

i have been blue a bit, and it is something i plan to share in a post .. as you may know , companions sometimes are good for your soul, and my two dogs , are going to be the subject ..

again, i am here , and not going anywhere anytime soon .. as i have many here who care about me , and so i take it one day at a time ..

thanks again .. adrian 

Oh good Adrian,I am told that I sometimes tend to over explain myself.So you are not the first to notice this about me.I didn't know you had a big family.How old are you.Do you have children? It sounds to me you and I have in common a love for our fathers.Or you could say share the same interest.I am a people person.I love to hug people and sometimes I think it freaks them out a little.But I am a very funny person.Always called the class clown.I also have had 3 daughters who are grown up and have their own families.I have been married 3 times.And the third time was a charm.Bobby and I have been married 25 years.I am about 8 years older than he is.He was adopted and his mother taught him to respect women and to help all women.He has a sister who was adopted also but not from the same family.He has helped me finish raising my girls and he became a grandfather when he was 28 and I was 36.So peoples' eyes got real wide when he pulled out pictures of his grand daughter.I guess since adoption to him is the norm,he really feels like they are 'our' daughters.And my children call him Papa.He has been the father in their life.The other 2 were disasters.They just seemed to be able to walk away from them.I don't know how a person can do that.But they did.I guess all my life I have always looked for the good in people.And a lot of times I think people used me.I hate confrontations.So I would just led things slide.I also try to be a mother to the younger girls like Morgan.What a wonderful girl.She has so much love to give and so much compassion.I love talking to her.I also was the girls work mom at Mayo so we do have that in common too.My computer has been acting up and I tried to upload some pictures but only succesfully got a picture of Raven who is 6 in her bathing suit.But I like your picture.I guess at first I was hesitant to reveal myself.You can never be too careful I think.I was scared the first few days I joined.I thought oh my I have just spilled my guts on a web site.But then I realized that we all have the same problems and the same things seem to bother all of us.Such as being judged for taking meds so we can have atleast some quality of life.I have been writing to dockside for over an hour and my neck is saying go lay down.But I really wanted to clear the air too.I have been told I talk too much.I thought maybe I might have said something wrong.I am glad that is not the case at all.Maybe because I have a sister and a daughter who are constantly putting me down I am on the defensive.But I won't be from now on.I will be blessed with you as a friend.We can talk about anything.I talk to the lady in the grocery store or where ever I go I seem to find someone who is lonely too and would love to have a nice conversation.We are a select group of people who have found each other.I am hoping that they come up with some miracle that will help us.I have Myofascail Pn Syndrome,Fibro,Chronic Sinusitis,8 herniated disc,Spinal Stenosis,Severe Sleep Apnea,Arthritic Knees,IBS,TMJ,I had breast implants when I was about 21 and I had problems with them from the beginning so the last surgery I had was to remove them.I used to have very long black hair,which I had to cut because I couldn't hold my arms up long enough to blow it dry.So now I wear it very short.And I have all over pain in my body.I have been in the hospital about 10 times since January.My most recent was Sept 25th for sinus surgery.I had these dental implants put in and they have given me nothing but problems.They were supposed to put an end to all of these oral surgeries which now numbers #29.They became infected and I continually told the oral surgeon they were.He said they were not.I went to 3 ent's before I found one who had the common sense to see that I did and she did cultures and found I had yeast and staph infection.So I am waiting to see her to see what is our next move.I need reconstructive surgery because I have practically no bone left in my maxible and mandable.But I seem to have a low immune system and am prone to infection.She said lets get the infection under control first.I love her.She did the surgery at Shands Jax.and I knew when I woke up that it was a success because I didn't have that nasty taste in my mouth anymore.So there you go.Those are my medical problems.How about you? What is the thing that bothers you the most?I can't wait to hear from you again.Lets keep in touch.Wishing you a great day today.I feel better already.Just talking to people helps me a lot.I tend to over react when my children or grand children get sick.But my oldest is a nurse and she always calms me down.Thanks Adrain for being there for me.I hope I can do the same for you.Where do you live.I mean just which state? I live in Jax.Fl.So we always have hot weather but I was born here and I love the hot.I wish I could move farther south as the cold seems to hurt me.Well my husband is up and we get to spend so little time together.He is a builder.His father helped build most of Arlington which is a subdivision of Jax.He works 6 days a week and usually atleast 12 hour days.So ta ta for now catch you on the flip flop.Jo

Hello Anonymus - wow, these are awesome .. thank you so much .. will need to print these up for myself and share with others ..

How are you feeling, last we spoke you were feeling okay , hope all is well and we meet again .. agserra