How do you handle the small stuff ?

The small stuff can sometimes be the most overwhelming. I'm fortunately not prone to anxiety or panic attacks but perhaps I can relate as a person who has chronic illness and frequently is overwhelmed by the demands of her life.

The first priority for me is to keep things in perspective. When I am moaning about how many things I am unable to do, I try to remember what it was like not to have anything at all, when a combination of events and illness left me literally homeless and living in a tent in So. Cal campgrounds. I start a gratitude list in my head of all the wonderful things I have in my life today, like a roof over my head, a warm and comfortable bed, food to eat, a vehicle to drive. Focusing on this positive list, which I could add to all day, keeps me in a positive place. There are many right now who go without even the basics of life. Imagine being one of them if you need to find a place to start your gratitude list.

Another technique I use is to focus on small goals and leave the big picture alone. Sure, I have a ton of things waiting for me to do. It seems I can never have all aspects of my life under control. If I focus on the business, the house goes to hell, etc. I am incapable of leading a so called normal life. So I do what I can, each and every day, to the best of that days ability, and let the rest go. Sometimes I let the house and the business go in order to spend a little time on social or pleasure events with my spouse, so he does not feel isolated because of me.

Chronic pain and illness can leave us without a social structure, focused on ourselves. I have found that doing some volunteer work can be a life saver. It means getting out of myself and thinking about someone else, doing for someone else. It reminds me there are many less fortunate than I, many who cannot do even the simple tasks I am capable of. So I find a way, either through a church or the local newspaper, to get involved in my community in a small way. It might mean helping to serve at a food bank or shelter, making phone calls for a candidate, visiting shut ins, etcetera. 

Maybe the best decision I ever made was adopting a puppy from a shelter. When life gets hard and I'm stuck in my bed or the cabin, she is my lifesaver. She always knows when I am down and sticks to me like glue. Taking care of her needs helps me be healthier and more active. Holding her close lowers my blood pressure. And talk about unconditional love! Even my sweet spouse can't beat her there!

Living with chronic pain and illness is never easy. But with this a network like this we are able to share burdens and ease each others suffering, share wisdom and experience, keeping lines of communication open for when we need them the most.

Thanks for the topic, Adrian, and keep making positive steps forward in your new home.

Christine

Hi- I can relate. Im living with chronic pain, ptsd, and various other things for the last 3 yrs. (much of it since my teens) Im 25 so you can imagine i didnt plan for this. I often have my pitty party and like you, Ive learned to just deal with it. I know God can do anything, but until He does, all I can do is pray and wait. That brings me to why im writing.

I have severe anxiety and panic attacks. I see a therapist but dont have an email for him and only see him every 2 weeks so things really pile up on me. My brain bogs down and .....really just shut down on me. I become so overwhelmed with thoughts and emotions that I cant think. When I was 14, I lost my grandmother and got real depressed and the therapist had me start a journal of thoughts. I started doing it again  later in life to relieve stress, track my symptoms, help overcome bad dreams, etc. I would use it at break during work and whenever i started feeling overwelmed in order to release my anger, anxiety, or whatever feelings i had.  Sometimes, If i need to talk, I get somewhere quit and talk to God. He's a pretty good listener :).

Hope this helps.