All aboard! Anyone with chronic pain can have a free ticket aboard this street car named "Depression". We expect standing room only today because the number of people with tickets is growing daily. So step right up and take a seat. All baggage will be checked at the door for any forbidden items like: lollipops, flowers, games, or any items of happiness, fun or amusement. Our first stop will be Helplessness Avenue. Our second stop will be Pessimism Parkway. Those who wish to ruminate should signal the driver. All aboard and away we go.
Before we arrive at Helplessness Avenue, let me give you some facts about this historic byway. This avenue received its name after a nearby laboratory conducted some famous experiments in the 1960's that unveiled the concept of "learned helplessness". In the face of inescapable discomfort, canines and humans alike were taught that their actions were futile. In turn, these poor creatures became passive and gave up trying. Scientist called this behavior "learned helplessness". Those that learn to be helpless give up because they expect that nothing will matter. All threats can lead to Helplessness Avenue. Here we go; we have arrived at Helplessness Avenue. Any stops requested? Anyone want to get off this street car named "Depression"? Next stop... Pessimism Parkway.
The story of Pessimism Parkway is a dark tale of woe. Years ago all the surrounding land was owned by one Lord, Lord Lament. Never married and with no friends, Lord Lament would walk the country side crying at the top of his voice, "Nobody Loves Me! Nobody Wants To Be My Friend!" The town's people could not understand why Lord Lament would explain his situation with such pessimistic thoughts. After all, he had rejected any invitation sent for gatherings and socializing. Out of habit, Lord Lament would walk the hills every night reminding himself and others about his belief that he was permanently doomed to a never-ending life of personal strife. After Lord Lament died, the town's people named a street after his habitual thoughts. The name of this street is our second stop, "Pessimism Parkway". Anyone want to get off this street car named "Depression"?
Today, we have many passengers requesting to ruminate between Helplessness Avenue and Pessimism Parkway. The need to brood runs strong today. We will now enter an endless circle between the first two stops. Mulling things over and over and over again will take some time; but, this street car has no deadline, no finish line. This street car named "Depression" has no particular destination and just keeps on going. Anyone want to get off?