For the last 3 years, I've been living with chronic pain. I am 43 years old and am still trying to maintain a job and care for my 2 children. I was a competative gymnast through college and I was always an active person. Life changed on Sept 1, 2005 with excruciating pain from a ruptured disc in my neck (caused from rolling over in my sleep!). Within 3 weeks I was quickly losing the function of my arm, and thus underwent neck surgery. Nine months after surgery and still having debilitating pain, I was finally diagnosed with chronic myofascial pain, which I continue to suffer from. After 2 years of miserable pain, with some temporary relief from trigger point injections (yet having side effects from the steriods), I finally found John F. Barnes Myofascial Release (JFB-MFR) Therapy, which is showing the most promising signs of long-term relief (after trying everything else the doctors could think of). It's a slow process, and I'm not pain-free, but I'm far more functional than I was for the first 2 years of this journey. I still live with some level of daily pain, many limitations, and all the associated sadness and suffering that goes along with it, but I'm finally hopeful and relatively more funtional than I had been for 2 years.
I wrote two acrostic poems from words that came to me about my moyofascial pain and my myofascial release therapy. I chose to create these simple acrostic poems, not only to describe my pain and treatment, but because they represent the way life is reduced to the most simple and basic activities when pain is your constant companion.
Myofascial Pain
By Maria Leet Sooclof ‘08
Misery
Years
Oppressive
Frustrating
Agonizing
Straight-jacket
Chronic
Invisible
Anger
Life-Changing
Prison
Aging
Insidious
Never-ending
Myofascial Release Therapy
by Maria Leet Sooclof ‘08
Mind-body
Yielding
Open-minded
Freedom
Alternative
Slow
Changing
Improving
Able
Letting go
Relief Effort
I speak from a position of living with pain for more than 36 years. When I was a student at the University of Michigan, I sustained a severe brain stem injury. Needless to say, I was plucked out of my life and put on the sidelines for most of that time. It is only NOW that I have identified a career that reflects my strengths, that I can imagine myself working in the mainstream.
The road to reintegration continues to be long and difficult. Just because I was able to do something yesterday, doesn't mean I will able to repeat the behavior. As long as I give my best, to whatever I'm attempting, I can be satisfied and content.
Nancy Bauser, ACSW, BCETS, BCDT - www.survivoracceptance.com
Disability Life Coach - nancy@survivoracceptance.com