Out of the Shadows

I am a chronic pain survivor. As most people with chronic pain know that to deal with the pain it must be recognized. It is constant and at times unrelenting. At first we try to avoid it, run away from it, or ignore it. But it doesn't go away until we face it and deal with it. This poem is my attempt at describing how I needed to face my pain to deal with it. I titled it Out of the Shadows

He hides in the dark,

but I know he is there.

Catching me always, alone, unaware.

He strikes in the night.

He offends in the day.

Somedays his outrage just won't go away.

I try to be careful.

I try to be strong.

sometimes the hurt just lingers too long.

I turn to avoid him.

His tack is the same.

Darkly his presence shows he is to blame.

If I try to avoid him,

pretend he is gone,

the blows become constant, I am never alone.

My friends try to see him.

They might sympathize.

For them he is hidden far from their eyes.

So tired of the chase,

my will is stretched thin.

He stalks me still from without and within.

So I turn to face him.

I take hold of his hand.

If he's always there, then with him I stand!

I hold him so close,

the shadow will  fade.

Never again will I join his parade!

I'll lead him each day

and at night in my bed,

I'll hand him a pillow to cradle his head.

Suzanne K. Leow, failed back syndrome, intrathecal pump user.