Jo

Health Interests

Fibromyalgia,  Back Pain,  Chronic Fatigue Syndrome,  TMJ,  DJD,  IBS,  Spinal Stenosis,  Sleep Apnea,  oral and teeth problems,  panic attacks

Drugs I am Taking

MSContin,  Clonopin,  Premarin,  Xanex,  Ambien,  nasonex,  advair diskus

About Me

I am a 57 year old woman who has been disabled for the last 11 years.I have been diagnosed with Fibro-,Myofascail Pn Syndrome,severe sleep apnea,DJD,IBS,Spinal Stenosis,8 herniated disc,panic attacks.I was a hairdresser for 21 years.I had to raise 3 daughters practically by myself.So I quit hairdressing to go to work at Mayo Clinic so that my family would have medical insurance and I thought I might be able to do a job sitting down until I was ready to retire.But that didn't happen.They worked us to death.And then when we were broken and sick,unable to work.We were discarded without the benefits we were promised.I fought it as long as I could.But it is very hard to fight a multbillion dollar corp.So here I am sitting at home every day.Wishing I wouldn't wake up the next day.I have 6 grandchildren and one on the way.I am also expecting my first great grandchild.I am trying to hang on for them.Some of my grands are too young if I were to die now.They would not have any happy memories of 'Nanny'The only way I survive is that I have a wonderful husband who helps with everything and works 6 days a week so that we have enough money to afford my RX's.And he is 8 years younger than I but he is now having back trouble.So I try and take care of the yard because he is out in it everyday.We can afford for me to be layed up.But he is our only income.He would never ask me to do these things.I volunteer.He is wonderful to my grandchildren and children.He is everybodies rock.So I pray each day to help me get through the pain,the social ostrasizing,the friends who consider me a high maintenence friend any more.Holidays are very tough on me.I have lost friendships and family members because I take meds that barely make my life livable.I do not understand people who would rather see their mother in excruciating pain.They think if I exercise I will be healed.They haven't got a clue.No matter how many times I tell them or show proof they believe what they want to.It is so sad.I suffer from depression because of loss of self.I cannnot do the same things any more and they don't understand its the disease not the meds.I thank God each day for my blessings.And for hope,because that is something we all have in common.And that is hope.I have tried to live a Christian life.And I am a moral person.But I do not know anymore if I have a purpose.Perhaps my purpose was to raise my children and having done that.I became very ill.I search for answers that may come from somewhere unexpected.I do not know how long I will stay connected.I get paranoid about telling what my meds are etc...But I trust that just about every body else is in the same boat.Thanks for caring.