I apologize for the length of this entry, i wrote it for another site i was trying to get help from and it gets old trying to repeat things over and over
I am 35 years old. i am a mother of 3 beautiful daughters. But.... i don't get to be much of a mom. i used to be a truckdriver and work extremely hard for my family. i fell out of the truck. about 11 months later i was driving and my arm started itching so badly that i stopped by a truck stop and bought a scourer that you wash dishes with and tried to stop the itching with that but i couldn't because it was so far inside. i went to the walkin clinic thinking i just had an allergic reaction to something or maybe got bit by something. (sometimes being a trucker you get into places that are not so nice lol). he knew there was something wrong. he put me on some medicine for over the weekend just in case it was an allergy but also gave me a prescription for a procedure to have done on Monday just in case i didn't feel better by the end of the weekend that way i wasn't wasting time and money going back and doing things that weren't right. i ended up going in and having the procedure done. I was so bad at that point that they had me in within a couple days. they also had started me on physical therepy because i had lost the use of my arm over the week.. i could not grasp anything. i am right handed and couldn't do anything with it. i was placed in the hospital and was there for 9 days. during the stay i ended up having 2 MRI's (claustrophic mind you), 2 emg's (i think thats the right letters, its where they put a long needle in your arm and track the pain levels), i had blood work every single day they took at least a half dozen vials of blood. i had been declared quarentined for 3 days of it because they were not sure what was going on. i was informed i had everything from shingles to its all in my head. they finally released me after 9 days with RSD with secondary fibromyalgia. i had continued physical therapy untill i found out that my insurance did not cover it at $300 a visit 3 days a week. so i had to stop. i also was getting treatments at the hospital every Monday (i don't know the name of it) but they would cut under my arm and thread a "suringe" with medicine into the nerve endings in my wrist and elbow. i would have this done on Monday. during the rest of the day Monday i could not use my arm, the numbing medicine would last all day so my arm would be like jello. i could be a normal person Tuesday and Wednesday. i could be a mom. by Thursday i was back in pain again, and no use in my arm. the tears were so often coming. i had stayed in touch with the origional dr. i had seen in the walkin clinic. he had helped me learn a little more about my illness. during this process i had been told that i would probly not be able to go back to work and definatly not trucking. i was also on 5 different medications. i was on Percocet Oxycodone, Neurotin, valium, an antibiotic and i don't remember what the other one was. I had entin one Monday all prepared to have another procedure with a few days of relief. they informed me they could not do the procedure unless i had money to put on my bill. i asked what bill??? i was confused, it was then that i was informed that the last 3 procedures were not being paid for by my insurance. i assumed that when you start a month of insurance that you finished the month of insurance. Boy was i wrong. they stopped my insurance Jan 6 2009. i had 3 procedures after that not knowing i had no insurance. so i ended up oweing them $3000. a grand for each procedure i had done. so ever since then i have been still going back to the walk in clinic. i was seeing the same dr that i had started with origionally when i thought i just had an allergy. he was offered a position somewhere else so i had to start with a new dr again.. this new dr at first followed the treatment the previous was doig which was basically just keep feeding me vicodin because it is all i can afford with the dr visit. I have been unable to work in over a year. i get disability from my job, but after i pay my house payment i live off of $300 a month. i went to get help. i have 2 kids that get medical because they are special needs. they are hearing and speech impaired. my oldest received medicaid just because she was in the househole. i was given medicaid but with a spenddown that i can not reach every month. they started me with less then $200 a month in food stamps. that is the extent of the help they give me. i have been applying for SSI but have been denied. my youngest daughter was awarded $99.02 a month. i am reapplying and reapplying. i am not giving up on it. I was on the begining of getting the implant in my hip the (electronic biostimulator) but that was when i found out i lost my insurance. (well i got distracted giving my girls love for bed sorry ) i have been unable to work in over a year, i was living on vicodin, but now the dr i was seeing in the walk in clinic has informed me that they are not there for long term care. he has informed me that he will not see me in the clic any more. the clinic has a "primary family care" in the front of the building but they said i have to start all over again as a new patient which is a $90 fee plus my meds if they decide to give them to me. i have not had the proper meds or treatments in a year. Now i have no dr or meds at all. i can't afford the fees they want. i am back to being bed ridden all the time. your told don't do that...... yeah ok you try to get out of bed and raise 3 kids with 2 chronic pain deseases with no meds. plus now i am sick on top of it. i know depression has set in during all of this. i was diagnosed manic depressive when my now 10 year old was 6 months old. i had been placed on Zoloft and it took over 2 years to get things adjusted properly. i moved to another end of the state and they refused to follow my previous dr's directions. she wanted me to start all over again. then i lost my insurance so it didn't matter. Then in order to suport my family i became a truck driver and you can not be one on some of the depression meds so i had to stay off the meds in order to suport us. i have a husband but he does not or can not (how ever you want to word it) hold down a job. so it was my place to suport us. But even with my illnesses now nobody dealt with my depression. So here i sit late on a school night. waiting for my girls to fall asleep so i can be in pain and them not see mom cry AGAIN!!! i have been trying to find home remedies for the pain but nothing is strong enough to work properly. The things others have recommended over the past year and half either takes insurance or money that i can't raise!! I used to love doing so many things. i used to be a very hard worker. i used to work 10-16 hour days plus still come home and take care of my girls and be back to work in 10 hours. and that is no exaggeration. Trucking is hard let alone as a woman. you have to work harder to prove that you can do the job. I was told that my RSD could be brought on by my fall that i had. but nobody can say yes or no definately. Nothing can be done about it even if it was because it wasn't anybody's fault that i fell. there was no neglect or anything. it was just one of those things. When i fell the first time, i fell from my truck to the ground on concrete. i went to the hospital. they did xrays and found nothig wrong. my job payed my bills and i was off for 2 weeks. i had bruises a foot long from hitting the steps of my 18 wheeler on the way to the ground. they put me in water therapy and after 2 weeks they said well the bruises are gone so we don't know why your not back to work yet. so if you are not back to work by this certain day you will lose all of your benefits. so off to work i went pain and all. ( i fell in early November 2007) i went back to work in December. i refell on ice in late February. i went to my chiropractor and he couldn't figure out why i was still in so much pain. he took his own trays. HE FOUND THE ISSUE!!! when i fell the first time i had tipped my pelvis 2 inches. so i went back to the dr they had me seeing and asked why they missed it. they said it was because of how big i am ( i was approx. 307 pounds) their xray machine has a weight limit of 300 lbs. so that "the density of my body stopped them from getting a clear picture" an easy way of saying i was to fat so the machine didnt work right. so they can not be held responsible. my chiropractor took me off work for a month. the whole month of March i sat on my butt trying to do what i can to feel relief. i went back to work in early April. On October 3 2009 is when my RSD started. then over the summer it spread to my right foot and leg (i think i forgot to mention that it all started in my right hand) I also was going through so much stress related things that it was enough for work to deny my workmans claims. so they refused to pay anything, no comp no medical bills NOTHING!!!! so a month off work and no compensation. And nobody can say for sure that my illness was caused by the injury or was it caused by the stress. Both are triggers and i had the extreme on both ends. So what do i do now that i sit here in tears knowing my depression is overflowing, my pain levels are increasing, my tolerence is decreasing and i have no insurance to get help!!!! That also leads to the extra issues of seeing the stresses and depression raises stress and depression and well stress and depression effect the nerves which then makes the illness even worse. I'm sorry i have rambled but i am just so desperate at this point Thank you for taking your time reading this.