KronikInvalidDated

Health Interests

PMDD,  Extruded Cervical Discs,  PTSD,  Anxiety,  Panic Attacks,  CFS

Drugs I am Taking

Effexor-XR,  Xanax,  Percocet,  Voltaren,  Flexeril,  Enjuvia,  B12,  Folbic,  Lovasa,  ViteD,  Stresstab,  Iron,  Calcium,  Vite-C

About Me

It's been nearly 20 years and I'm realizing I'll never get the comfort of validation from my family. Instead they wpm t budge in their 'you just need to get off all those drugs' stand. I've had MRIs and labwork in their face and my family won't look at them. I'm also realizing he and his family and the friends who knew, will never tell me they are sorry, or, maybe ask me if they can help me in my life now. I begged for many to intervene when I was unable to speak for myself. I'm living a lonely life and have difficulty describing what the pain and the violence have done to my personality. I was just thinking about the years earlier when I ran in the sun and had many friends. All of this is gone. I long to work again, but won't lie and say I am reliable to an employer. I do not like living alone at all. I used to have such an outgoing and courageous demeanor and people are drawn to this. They are not drawn to me now. People tend to think, you'r sick, you'll get better, and when you don't, they get tired of you. I also suffer emotional damage in a lot of forms due to abuse which has left me sort of melancholy, high-maintenance, and borderline cash poor. What kind of man would wantt his? Life was different for my parents. The man didn't ask the woman 'where she worked'? I have friends online and three wonderful children. I try to limit myself to one to two life tasks a day. I am able to take care of my bills and my body, but it is becoming difficult to keep my house as tidy as it used to be and at this time I'm w/o a car so feel like I'm a recluse and feel some agoraphobia when I have to leave the house. I wish I'd foreseen I might have incurred this chronic pain and left abuse earlier. I loved living, jumping, running, dancing, and just being active. I'm not me anymore. Pretty sorry story I know. I've got my good traits too, but one needs to cross the first bridge to see these. Only a special person will do such, and that's all I'd settle for anyway, .. a beautiful and special person to be my life partner in what there is left of it.