Linda

Thanks, Now that you mention it, I think it is a flourosccope.

That would be wonderful to have your images on a Dvd to take with you to your apts and also keep for your own records.  I've just never asked for my images, just the reports from the specialist that read them.

It bothers me so, to hear about your pain and I just don't know what you should do.  I would be very worried too.

Have you thought about emergency?  Didn't you say something about having difficulty breathing also??  Now that would scare me into heading to the emergency room.

Are you under any one doctors care right now or are you between primary care & Pain mgt doctors?

I surely hope and pray that you can find a better answer to your concerns and get the proper treatment for your many painful conditions.

I was not able to attend church last night or this morning either.  The holiday activities and cooking has me down in higher levels of pain and of course the dreadful fatigue that makes me feel like a shower is too much work (But I did finally go and sit in a hot tub, in hopes that the pain would be better)

I'm hurting from my neck, clear down to my knees on both sides.

Winter pain flares are the worst!

Hoping you can get some help soon

Betty

Linda

I have been in chronic pain since 2003, I too had a very active life, a super mom for my two growing boys in our very athletic family.

I held onto my past for a very long time, it's kind of like that when my journey through pain began, my life was help in suspended animation.  I refused to move on and except the pain and the new chapter in my life.  All this did was prevent me from facing the fact of living in today or in the now!

I think that last winter when I was diagnosed with having FM too, was when I finally sat down and decided that I was going to have to except this pain, because I now knew that I was going to have to face this for the rest of my life.  Before, I guess, I was not willing to face it and I held onto the past, because the now and the future was really too much for me to think about or consider.

I have also lowered my expectations for myself, I set reasonable goals for myself, If you continue to set such high goals and expectations for yourself, that makes me worry for you, you'll not find peace and any happiness by doing it, you'll have to constantly deal with great disappointment with yourself, and that makes me very worried for you.

I completely understand why your trying so hard and I also know that it's not easy to slow down and let the housework go, or not do your great decorating as your accustomed to.  I really feel for you, as I've lived with a perfectionist too and I understand how difficult it is to let go of such a strong high standard for your personality.

I'm not sure if your sanding the woodwork and using paint or varnish of some type on the wood, but if you have COPD, then that is not going to help you breathe.  I would say that you should do is much as you can stay comfortable and then ask another family member to finish for you.  I know it will be hard and NO, they wont do it as perfect as your accustomed, but try and let go of that.

If you want to work on the window coverings, then work on them for an hour of to the point that your pain elevates, put them down for the day and then do the same the next day and on & on, until they are finished.  I would not however put a date, like before christmas on your schedule.  Your not doing any good for you or your family, by pushing yourself into so much pain that your not able to breathe, function and your wreathing in pain.  At my Pain mgt classes I took, the constant teaching every day, was to do what you want and as soon as you feel the pain flare up a little, STOP what your doing imediately and rest, ice, heat or what ever you do to try and control the pain and go back to it later or another day.

It is difficult to change your habits, but if your now a pain sufferer, then you have to live by some kind of obediance to your pain.  Pushing through to finish every project every day is really bad for your pain.  Your driving it up to uncontrollable limits, which makes it nearly impossible for your medication to work.

If you have COPD, as my Mother in-law does, then I think you should get a referral to a lung specialist and go in and get on the medications and treatments to help you breathe.  If your not getting enough oxygen to your other parts of your body, then that too is causing too much pain.  Your muscles and tendons, and your whole body needs oxygen to function properly.  Try and go for a short walk outdoors when your able, I've found that walking with my puppy and doing a little obediance with him, distracts me from the pain that the walk causes me.  But the walk out doors in the fresh air is good for me even if I have to lay down when I get back.  You'll feel more like a normal person if you try to get some type of routine in your life, even if the routine seems simple, it's still an accomplishment and you can feel good about yourself for following through.

I'm not trying to be hard on you and mean.  I care about your well being and I think that how your handling your pain right now is really harming you all around.  If you change your goals and are not pushing yourself to these limits of pain and distress, then you will be able to get back to feeling good about yourself again.

You did not ask for this life, but neither did the rest of us.  I'm positive your an amazing woman, and that does not mean that your not still an amazing woman, because you have to except your limitations.  If your a house cleaning machine, then do your house work choosing one room a day, then just feel very good about being able to do one room and completing your goal of one room, without creating overwhelming pain levels for the rest of the day, becuase you refuse to slow your self down and make new goals. 

If you create new goals and expectations for yourself, then you'll be able to sit down with your family in the evening instead of being overwhelmed with pain and filled with panic over it, and enjoy just spending some nice time with them.

You Please Take Care of yourself.

You were an amazing woman and you still are!  You just have a new set of goals.

God Bless Dear, I'm praying that you can find your new way of life and thinking.

Betty