I want to thank so many of you for your wonderful support & kindness during yet another of my dark periods while suffering in such pain & emotional pain as well.   

  As most of you have found, I was in a very dark place because of unrelenting, insurmountable pain.  My fibro use to flair like a rollercoaster ride with ups & downs, lulls in the pain, but this past year it seems like it just keeps getting worse.  On top of this I went about 2 months with no pain medication due to changing doctors & treatment options & so on.  Well, as the doctor had me get up on the table laying on my stomach, something to the right of my tailbone/spine area popped & I instantly breathed a sigh of relief, the tension & tightness had subsided.  The doctor then pushed her thumbs about on my sacrum area to find the most painful spot - boy did she find it! I then received an injection of lidocain, cortisone & a long-acting form of lidocain.  It really helped, so did the pain medications I was prescribed (finally)!  Something strong enough to work that I wasn't allergic to, yippee skippy!!!

   I know often when we pray we pray for our will, rather than God's will.  We want what we want, when we want it.  I've been noticing that when things happen in God's own time, the adventure -even when painful- has much more insight, and a much more appreciated reward.  I know many people who may read this do not believe in God.  Whomever your higher power be, or even if you believe in kharma or no real belief system at all- I think you may be able to understand what I'm talking about.  I'm sadly addicted to diet coke.  I can go days without one, but by about day 6 I'm really, really wanting one.  When I get one, the flavor is savored even moreso than if it were a daily one I got maybe more out of habit than want. 

     Timing is such an interesting concept, such an intriguing thing.  Timing can mean nothing & everything all at once. I received a Christmas gift just a few days ago, on January 2nd to be precise.  The gift is a book called, "Painted Prayers by Jody Uttal" at the bottom of the cover it says: "inspiration & comfort for a questioning world".  The author used watercolor art as therapy while her mother was dying, she then incorporated poetry & prayers from various religions some of which she altered a bit.  The conglomoration of words, colors & expression of ideas is mesmerising, at least to me.  It has inspired me to try to get back into artwork & writing on a more regular basis.  Writing, hopefully not as dark too! haha.  Between this book & another given to me by a friend close to Thanksgiving time called, "You Gotta Keep Dancin'" by Tim Hansel which, at the bottom of the cover says, "In the midst of life's hurts, you can choose joy!"  This book also borrows philosophies & quotes from others but both books are uplifting, motivating & easy reads, even for those of us interupted by furry babies, feathered ones & even the human ones, or just plain interrupted by pain.