It does take a doctor to diagnose FM (and not all of them are really up on the disease). Unfortunately there is no one good diagnostic test for FM but your symptoms are quite similar; muscle stiffness, body-wide pain that migrates from place to place, irritable bowel problems...those are all found in FM. Some physicians use pressure-point tests to diagnose FM but others do not; in the end one doctor may diagnose FM when another would not.  The best thing to do is to find, if possible, a doctor experienced with FM to give you an examination; that, of course, is easier said than done. 

Some people with FM do better on Ultram but many do  not. In fact finding what works in FM is often takes quite a bit of trial and error. Be sure to push your doctors to keep trying different approaches. Lyrica, for instance, is a drug that works for some FM patients that you might want to try. 

Because FM is still rather controversial it's important that patients educate themselves about the different ways to treat it.  

Why don't you check out the FM site on Health Central; its quite good: http://www.healthcentral.com/chronic-pain/fibromyalgia.html

You also might want to check out FM support groups in your area to see if they can recommend a doctor.

http://www.fmaware.org/site/PageServer?pagename=community_supportGroupDirectory