How do I know how much to expect from my husband with chronic pain?
My husband has been living with chronic pain for 12 1/2 years. He has sciatic pain in his left leg; upper neck and shoulder pain from a car accident and on- going migraine headaches. As his wife I try to be supportive and understanding but also encourage him to be productive and as active as he can realistically be. There are things we both want to pursue in our lives but he is very afraid because of his pain. I am questioning how much of my life it is appropriate for me to give up on and at what point is it reasonable for me to expect him to move past his fears? I am afraid of ending up angry and resentful. How do we navigate these issues and maintain what has always been a loving and supportive relationship?
Hi Believer,
My first question to you is is your Husband being treated by a Pain & SPine Center for his Chronic Pain? The reason I ask, is because I am and have been being treated at one for many years. They will ask you if there is anyone in your Family that you would like to have get help with dealing with the Chronic Pain Person? They do have Psychologists on staff to help Family Members so that they best can have a better understanding of what that Person who is living in the Chronic Pain is dealing with and all of the different stages, pain and feelings that they are experiencing.
I hope if your Husband is being treated by a Pain Center that maybe you could speak to the Dr. there and let them know how you are dealing and feeling about this and see if they can get you the help that you also need.
All the best to you and your Husband.
- Thank you for your input
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Believer
Monday, October 26, 2009 at 08:28 PM
Thank you so much, Ladybey. Our health care provider has a spine clinic and he has been seeing a psychologist there but that has not been offered to me. I will ask about this.