This was originally a private message, I decided to make it public...

Start looking forward,not backward.I had a lot of sh.. happen in my life and i had to fight to get well.today it is 2008.I know it is harder for most people and it took me 10 years.I struggled and had anxiety and fought but when I knew i wanted to get well that was the answer for me.when you fear god-god did not put that there....i was there many times i have bipolar.i have been to the hospital many many time i thought i was jesus.put the past in the past,it takes a long time and a lot of hard work.until you do this you will not be able to move forward.and that is why we always think we are worth nothing be cause we have crappy childhoods but who the heck in theor life lives a perfect one anyway?get out there put your head up high and be somebody.

Young lady, as a son, husband and father I feel for what you have endured. 

On to the important stuff, this young man and your relationship with him. 

As far as the cousin thing, you aren't really cousins.  (And for the record, you can marry your cousin in Texas)  That's not why I live here, but I will say I had some really hot cousins.  I think we were all tempted, but it was taboo, and we had too much respect for the family to pursue anything.   But like I said you aren't "cousins." 

It sounds like you have met someone who has the ability to treat you with respect and as a lady, which you deserve.   How he gets along with his mother will somewhat determine his general treatment of other women, so check that.  

You deserve to love and be loved.  If he is a nice guy with good relationships and respect for his parents...I say take a leap of faith and pursue it.  After you determine he is worthy of your love...start suggesting moving... to shorten the gap between you. 

It sounds like some good caring people are available (family) talk to one you are very close to, tell them how you feel.     

You sound like a very nice young lady with a lot of love to (develop) and give.  Yes, love is developed...so take it a day at a time...trust in your heart and in yourself.  Ask for divine guidance. 

Best wishes to you.

Mr. B