I was really skinny as a child, all the way through high school, until
I went on the pill. In those days, the hormone mix for the Pill was
pretty crude, and I gained a lot of weight, which I fortunately lost
when I went off of it. But before the pill, I was scrawny, although my
appetite was normal. I even tried downing milkshakes with raw eggs to
gain weight, but I was still stick thin.
Once
I hit 30, my metabolism slowed down, but I still had no problem keeping
the weight off when I put my mind to it. My Multiple Sclerosis did put
an end to aerobic exercise for me, but I've still been able to lose
weight when I get serious about it, and sometimes even when I'm not
trying. I ended up weighing less a few months after Lawrence was born
than I did when I get pregnant with him. I was too busy to snack and I
was running up and down stairs a lot.
So
my history is that I can cut back and get more exercise when I've been
overindulging, and I see results within a couple of weeks, tops. Well,
history changed a couple of months ago. Mindful that I already am
wearing a larger size than I'd like, and even those clothes were
getting tight, I started walking half an hour five days a week at
lunchtime (uphill in one direction). I started eating salads for lunch,
snacking on raw vegetables and skipping dessert. At work, I started
walking up two long flights of stairs to the ladies' room on the third
floor instead of going down the one shorter flight of stairs to the one
in the basement. All things that should have made me drop at least five
pounds in the first couple of weeks.
Instead,
I kept gaining weight. I gained weight in places that I've never gained
weight, like my calves and ankles, and also in places where I rarely
gain weight, like my hips and thighs (I'm an apple shape, so the first
place that I gain weight is in my waist).
As
the number on the scale kept creeping up, I racked my brain, looking
for a reason. Granted, I'm a lot more sedentary now at my full-time
"real" job than I was when I was a full-time mom. I realized that I am
eating differently at work than I do on the weekends. At work I eat
breakfast early, a decent sized one, and then I eat a big lunch. At
home I graze. I eat a small breakfast, then have a snack mid-morning,
have a small lunch, have a snack mid-afternoon, etc. I probably eat
less that way. I know that I lose a couple of pounds every weekend and
then gain it back once the work week starts. So in the last year since
I started my job at UC Berkeley, I have slowly gained weight.
But
none of that explained why I've gained so much in the last couple of
months. After all, my activity has increased, for one thing. Have I
been eating more? Well...I started realizing that whether I was at work
or at home, I was thinking about food a lot more. Normally, I don't
think about meals until it's time to start preparing them. In fact, if
my husband's traveling, I feed my son dinner, but skip it myself.
When's the last time that I can remember myself all of a sudden
thinking about food, if not constantly, at least two or three times as
much as usual? When my doctor raised my dosage of the antidepressant I
was on (Norpramin). I'm not big on junk food or on carbohydrates in
particular (although I do think fresh bread is the
perfect food). I mostly ignore snack machines in any building I'm
working in. But all of a sudden, I was visiting the snack machine two
or three times a day and buying huge asiago cheese bagels at lunchtime
for an afternoon snack. When I made the connection between my sudden
desire for carbos and the increased dosage, I decreased the dosage back
to what it had been (after talking to my doctor).
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