Victim To Surviving To Living

Dear Kimberly,

Your post really got to me. At first I thought it sounded so much like me. Ofcourse, I would never begin to know how to put such powerful words down on paper. What you have written is pretty heavy but honest and I am so glad you did.

My main illness for the last 100 years or so has been migraines and what you have written in your first paragraph is so much what I go through when I have a migraine that I think I am not going to get through.

Now, I have aquired some depression along the way which is very common with migraines and why not when you have had no social life really and just had to be confined to your home so much.

I am finding out now that through genetics I have inherited my mom's mainic, as it was called many many years ago, depression. Strange that it is coming out so stronge now.  According to my doc I am at the age for it and need to be really careful. I do know something is going on because I can feel it and can tell because of my behavior.

Now, my doc is trying a couple different meds on me to see how I react or as I say behave. Well, one drug really tokk me to the oppisite so I am off that. Doc is trying to help me out if not he say's it is time to see a psyc.

So, that is my dilema...I really don't want to go. Sure I have all kinds of childhood voodoo hoodoo that is not worth mentioning. But, I'd rather figure out how to get going with now. Not  much time left and I would like to know how to enjoy it and if at all possible without pain.

Thanks again for your post. I really felt some of those words.

Best wishes to you!

Marlene          

Dear Kimberly,

I could really identify with what you said. It is true to me, in my life, that I too am in the process of surviving to actually living where there is a balance to be had...

I am slowly but surely getting there and know what you mean, just by the title of your article...I am transitioning between survivor to the land of the living with therapy and a loving family.

I too came from an abusive background, but no longer look back and feel victimized. I used to do that for the longest time, then one day I woke up and was able to put it all in the past and bury it once and for all...That was a turning point for me.

I appreciate everything you spoke of and it seems you have put words that are true to my life and I am sure many others.

Dear Kimberly,

What an inspirational post!  And one I will likely share with others who are on the same journey as you. 

As a therapist I often talk to clients about the same topic.  Instead of saying "living" though, I say "thriving".  The example I use is of a plant.  I've had plants that have survived bad to terrible conditions and they hang on, but that's about it.  But then there are those plants, like the one in my office, that are full and lush and flowering beautifully. Those plants have gone beyond merely surviving to thriving... which is what you are obviously doing.

Congratulations, and may you continue to blossom!

- KB

I'm older then you, but your statement was right on the money to me.  I've been that way most of my life.  YOU have helped me to start being positive, not isolating, and take one day at a time.  Thank you for sharing your information. Bless You!!

Hi Kimberly,

I am surviving now. And I am proud of myself for that, coming from such a hard past.  But I would like to live.  And I don't know exactly how to change. I know I need to change my thinking and behavior patterns... So your post was very interesting and I will be glad to be talking to you...just not sure how all these sites work- is this the depression or anxiety site?  I see new people on here today, not the ones I have seen the first couple of weeks when I started posting..

Cheers,

Marishka