First time here

I am new to this website and I am hoping to find some additional help in dealing with my illness.  I have been on many of the well-known meds for depression, but I am medication free right now.  I haven't recovered, I just gave up on the pills.   I'm not responding to the drugs anymore.  I am seeing a new therapist.  I am more scared now than I've ever been because I recently moved away from home with my fiance.  I thought I wanted to come to this new place... I know now that I was just running.  And my illness ran just as fast behind me. 

I need help.  Please respond with insight and kind words.  I need it.  Please help... I feel so cold and alone.