Sensitivity SUCKS

Hello everyone! 

Despite my happy tone, I have had an awful day. 

I was at a club after school and I was bouncing off the walls, real hyper, real happy.  Saying random things that my friends laugh at.  The teacher was giving us math problems and as he wrote one on the board, I started to discuss with my group how to begin on it.  This kind of strange kid, mood-swingy, often rude, says, "Well, now you're serious." 

This usually wouldn't get me mad, but I was sick of his stupid comments so I started to jab my pencil against my wrist to control my anger.  He heard the thump and looked at my hand and said, "Now she's trying to cut herself!" 

I was like cursing in my mind, and I really wanted to take my pencil and scratch out his face and stomp all over it.  I felt like I was going to cry, so I picked up my white board and put my feet on the table and held the board over my face so he wouldn't see my tears. 

This is really extrodinary of me.  I used to be so strong, but this was when I made most of my mistakes.  I never cried.  I wasn't really that happy. 

Now I'm hyper happy, feeling older and younger but still happy.  Peppy happy.  Crazy-happy.  How many bananas?  happy.  (If you're confused, ignore it.)  But I'm like a china vase.  I'm unsteady.  I'm going to topple at any minute. 

This kid's a jerk, so I really shouldn't care.. 

But still, I do.  It wasn't really much of the kid but the words.  I can't stand it at all when people poke fun at me cutting myself.  It's a recipe for instant tears.  Most kids are respectful of it (which I don't expect but I'm grateful for it).  How do most kids know about it, anyway? 

So now I feel like crud because this kid's a jerk.  How long will this go on?