I_am_looking_forward_to_the_rubber_room

I am to go insane.

Chemical Depression has always been a part of my life. some people inherit money,

some of us inherit medical problems.  But I have to hold it together for my daughter.

In the past two months almost everything has gone wrong.

My father is a hospice patient or should I say his body is the patient, he has not 

been on this planet for months.  My parents worked so hard all their lives, now

due to a thief and the stock market, my mother is not only having to deal with my 

father's approaching death but major financial problems as well as her health.

Three weeks ago, after 18 years with the same company I was laid off.  They

closed my department, it broke my heart.  I put my heart and soul in my work.

I thought if you worked hard enough, everything would work out.  WRONG !

My husband is disabled and has alot, alot, alot of medical problems. The company I worked for gave me NO serverance pay, but they are paying for their part of the medical insurance for three months. Some how I have to come up with the remainder. Umemployment is only $275 per week.  It's better than nothing, but I have a husband, a teenager, a dog, a cat and a bunny to think about.  I was living pay check to pay check, now what.

The first week of my lay off, I had to help my mother with legal issues and my

daughter through her first heart break with a boy. The second week was one

doctor's appointment after doctor's appointment.  My daughter ended up in

the hospital with viral meningitis, she had to stay in the three days to be sure

it was not bacterial.  Then my husband was operated on Tuesday, in a long line

of surgeries.  I was always so careful not to let his medical appointments / issues

affect my job. In fact my job was my escape.

I need a job and fast.   My life is a mess and I am trying so hard to make it look

like everything is OK, but it's not.  My daughter goes off to college in two years,

she is my reason for getting up in the morning, otherwise turn out the lights.

Oh God why, I know their are alot of people with more problems or bigger

problems, but it still hurts.

Sorry, just needs to complain.