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  Did your animals die or are they lost?  I hope they are OK. I know how you about losing your husband. I lost my husband to a bad divorce about 3 years ago. He left for a woman and her kids right next door. Death is hard and I wish I could help you more.  I wish I could have help you out. I have taken care of animals for my friends for years. My oldest daughter did something like this to me. I had to go to the hospital and she was left at the house to take care of it.  I came back after stay with my mother for a month to a horror scene. She had had  her friends over and they stay all night and made a mess and my youngest daughter's dog was hurt bad. Some one called the police on me for some reason and they really laid it out to me. I told them I had been in the hospital and I just came back from my mom's. They didn't want to hear it. I started cleaning up the mess and took the heat. Than I had to deal with my daughter. Oh well I still love her and she was going though a bad time with divorce. Her dad did her totally wrong. I know it is hard but we are all here and you can talk us anytime. God loves you and you know that he want let you handle every thing by your self. You will join Him and your loving husband when your time comes. Don't try and force it to soon. Please take care and know you all care for you.

 My heart aches for you--I can't imagine the pain of losing your husband and I want to reach out to you in some way.  I wouldn't presume to give you advice--I will just share with you some of the things I do to fight with my depression.  First thing is I take my meds!  I never forget how bad it can get, so if you aren't seeing someone or don't have a doctor--I can't say "get one", but I will tell you that I did!  I'm remembering the time just after my mother died when I thought I would never have energy and be happy again.  Friends took me places--to lunch--to shop--to talk--and that kept me moving.   I think that's important--just keep moving.  I have years of living with depression in varying degrees.  This is what I do when it's bad.   Try to go on automatic pilot--get up; brush your teeth; shower; dress;  eat; do something--anything--change the sheets; do a wash; fold it and put it away; go outside; walk once around the outside of the house; listen for birds;  rest; eat again; go to the library or the mall--someplace where there are people around; go home; rest again; eat again; be good to yourself and sleep.  If you can't sleep try listening to an audio book on tape or some music.  I often put myself back to sleep listening to someone's voice read a book that I seldom remember!  There's comfort in the human voice.  When you take your walk around the house, look for a yellow flower or a butterfly.  If you can, find a support group and go to meetings.  Cry if you need to.  Don't give up--it won't always be like this!  That's the one thing I know for sure.  This will pass or at least change and there will be new challenges.  Don't give up.  Please.  I haven't lost a husband but I have lost and grieved much and things do change and I do have some energy and some happiness some days!  It's worth the fight.  Karen