Taking Care of the "side effects"

Over the years I used the "don't open it" mechanism of dealing with bills I couldn't pay or other things I didn't want to face. The "drop" letter from school, the missed doctors appointments, too job interview I missed....

I always told myself it was a money issue, I WAS broke, that was true. But not dealing with problems, that was anxiety and depression, and I wasn't making things any better by ignoring them.

For several years I have ignored the year I didn't file taxes. Why do I do this? I KNOW that it will catch up with me, and it's dumb. Over the past year or so I have been facing my fears... going to get the last HIV test...(negative, after stressing about it for a year) dealing with the divorce from an impulsive (and secret) marriage entered into shortly after I split up with the kids dad. (yes this is the first place I have revealed that)

Today I went to the IRS, steeling myself for the judgemental attitude I was sure to get when I said not only had a failed to file one year.. I didn't know which year it was because I was missing returns for 3 years.

The rep just got my info, handed me the forms I needed and wished me a nice day.

Now once I actually fill out the forms, make a payment arrangement for the couple hundred bucks I owe ... that will be one more depression "side effect" coped with.