Today I feel a bit better from this flu thing. I fought the depression for one more day.... yesterday was hard. I have found that I need to figure out how to rely on myself and have my own power. I have done a lot of journaling and even though each day is a struggle and I am having a panic attack right now, I can get through. This one minute is all I need to get through....
That needs to be enough for now. What with my past haunting me, my present issues with my husband that I am divorcing, no job, no money and no way out.... I have the power of getting through right now. And that has to be enough.... Eventually I know, that I will be out of here, be better able to think for myself, deal with the past and take on the here and now more wisely. I can think positively about my mental illness and know that most of the symptoms that go on in my body are somatic and just PTSD and depression. I know that one day I will conquer this....
Hang in there Marley. It will get better. The down side is it seems as if you hit bottom. The up side is there is no where to go but up. It looks like you have the right attitude with your desire to make it through this. You're also right that sometimes all you have to look at is getting through this minute. I will have to remember that. I'm also trying to figure out how to rely on myself for certian things and to find my own power. I have found that with the really hard times when I feel like I can't talk to anyone, praying helps. At least I'm getting my feelings out to someone. Once again, hang in there and believe that it will get better.
Thank you Stewie :)