am I wrong?

Helena, I am so sorry for the loss of your baby, it must have been heartbreaking.  I don't think there's anything wrong with you, you are still in the stages of grieving - you lost your boyfriend and your baby.  You might even have post-partum depression.  If you feel like your grief is too overwhelming, you should maybe find a therapist to talk to, or maybe you could find a grief support group - sometimes hospitals and mental health clinics have them.

 

One thing I would be cautious about is having another baby to make yourself feel better.  It might, but the baby needs a healthy mother.  Babies are very demanding, sweet as they are, and if you're already depressed, that doesn't make it any easier.

 

I wish you all the best and hope you will soon feel better.  You'll never forget your child, but the pain will ease.  You can write here any time.  God bless you.

Hey there

 

I am thinking about what a horrendous experience this must have been for you...I cannot even imagine.  I experienced a miscarriage at about ten weeks and...it was devastating.  So to lose your boyfriend and your baby at six months...you are a very strong young woman.

 

I am so sorry.

 

How have you grieved?  I had a dresser drawer of baby things and I would open it and...cry.  It helped a lot.  You will never forget that baby.  It is a love only a mother can know...and you are a mom who has lost a child.

 

If you are able...please tell us more of your story.  We want to listen. 

 

Again...I am very sorry for your loss.

Thank you both sooo much!!! I do feel a lot better knowing there are people out there that do seem to understand. I have really no way of coping, and maybe that is why I feel ive never gotten over this. When I found out my prgnancy had to be terminated I threw away everything I had. And now whenever I see anything that is baby related I start crying. At nights I just think about everything ive gone through and I just cry my self to sleep. No one knows this, I never feel like I can tell anyone just because I think they will not understand me.

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Your allowed to your feelings and the things that you want. And your not being dramatic with your feelings, you went through a traumatizing experience. How long ago did this happen? What I would tell you is to be careful with your choices and your expectations. Does your boyfriend want kids? Do you feel that this new boyfriend is a long-term thing? I only ask because I have raised 3 boys alone and the stress is tremendous. If you have only been with him a short time, maybe waiting is a good idea. I know that something in the baby area happened to me, not as seriouse as your situation, but I could not stand to see baby stuff, or baby's, or hear about marriage for a long time because it hurt. I remember one day going in the store and I didn't feel the same way anymore, those things didn't bother me. It just takes time. I know it is hard, but try to give your self time to heal before going into another situation.