1972.....

Mom and Dad wanted to talk to us, we couldn't believe what they told us. That mom was going to have a baby. We were shocked, if mom was having a baby that means that mom and dad do it! That's what our first thoughts were, we couldn't quite grasp that. I think we had basically just realized what was involved in making a baby, I was 12 and Chrissy was 10 or 11. I remember we went to the basement to do laundry after they told us. We sat there discussing it, trying to figure out what it meant to us, like there was something we could change. I think we were embarrassed more then anything. It confused us a lot, our mother acted like sex was the most sinful thing in the world. When my dad would kiss her she would wipe her mouth off, and tell him it was gross. So how did they do it, if that's how she felt about it? They were not parents that kissed and hugged, no public displays of affection, mainly because of my mother.

I definitely felt that my mom considered sex to gross, dirty, ugly, disgusting, these were all the adjectives that she used pertaining to sex or affection.

While in Chicago, my dad's sister, her husband and my cousin came to visit. During their visit something happened that made my dad mad at us or me not sure. But he beat me pretty bad, my cousin was there when it happened but her parents didn't believe her when she told about how my dad had hit me. I don't remember this it wasn't until I was in my forties that my cousin and I actually talked about it. I couldn't remember my dad ever hitting me till much later in my life.

Summer spent with grandparents again, this time we flew home for the next school year.

Well we found out we were going to be moving again, our dad got a promotion and we were moving to Pittsburgh. We were pleased about that now we would only be a couple hours away from our grandparents.

1973.....

I discovered boys about this time. And had a group of friends that I did things with. I was at a friends house and there were boys there, this one boy I liked, we started kissing. I didn't realize it but he had put a hickey on my neck while we were kissing. I was in the basement doing laundry and my mom was down there with me. She saw the hickey and she went crazy, started screaming at me that I was a whore, grabbed my arm and pulled me upstairs with her. She pulled me in front of my dad and made him look at my neck. She said, "Just look at this slut of a daughter!" He wouldn't look at me or talk to me after that for days, like he was so ashamed of me. I had no idea what was going on, had no idea what having a hickey was suppose to mean, especially to my mother.

In her mind because I had a hickey I was having intercourse, and of course she totally blew it out of proportion. All I did was kiss a boy, I didn't even know that he had put a mark on me.

I enjoyed going to school probably because it got me out of the house. One of my friends was threatened by another girl at school. She was afraid to walk home from the bus by herself because this girl said she was going to beat her up. I told her I would walk her home. When we got off the bus the bully girl started in on my friend, I told her to leave her alone. So the bully started a fight with me, she scratched my eye and my arms up pretty bad. But in the end I beat her up and walked my girlfriend home, then went home myself. No one was home at my house so I went to the neighbors house, she got me cleaned up and I went home. After my mom & dad got home I told them what happened. Then there was a knock at the door the police were there because of the fight I was in. The girl told the police that I had brass knuckles, I didn't even know what they were.