live in the country with chickens and goats
get married to a wonderful man
have a child
live in Mexico
follow my heart in my livelihood
have more intimate friends
let go and just be me more
choose people I like to be around
live in Hawaii, travel the world
give speeches
give give give
trust
play more
not care what others think
live in a small town
slow down and make choices for a slow, simple life
have a farm
spend time with my parents
I like your list Marishka!
Tell me more about Mexico and Hawaii...what entices you to these places? I am not much of a traveler myself. Never been out of the country...furthest I have been is Niagra Falls!
I am glad you are back to writing on the site. You have been very missed.
Thanks for contributing your list to our discussion. It is always good to see you.
I would have enjoyed my kids more, rather than look at parenthood as being one more task to get through.
I would have traveled more, gone to Europe to see where my ancestors came from and seen parts of the U.S. I've never been to.
I would have tried harder to figure out what my heart's desire was and then go for it, rather than giving up college so I could move away from home.
There isn't much I regret, though, because I believe that where I am is where I'm supposed to be, for whatever reason. I'm still going to get some of that travel in, though!
Hey Judy
First of all...thanks so much for starting this topic with your post. It really did get me to thinking. I can't imagine what Erma Bombeck was feeling at that point where...you know it is over and...there is no more going back...no more chances. I want another chance.
Anyways...
Travel...this seems to be popular. I am such a homebody. I get scared to travel very much. It is very exciting but I am always afraid something will go wrong. Maybe I should loosen up and go with the flow. When I was a teen, however, I would travel cross country by greyhound bus. Oh the stories I have from that time!. Would i do it today? noooo. Maybe in an RV or something. Even then...i like the security of home.
Judy...thanks so much for sharing your list. You always make my day when you comment.
If I were playing the "if...then..." game, I would do these things:
not put up with angry, negative people
not get married
would seek the company of happy, upbeat people but be kind to those who aren't
I would accept my (deceased) sister's invitation to visit her home in Puerto Rico
would go back to Hawaii with a good tour guide & design my own schedule
go to Italy w/good tour guide and see all the early Renaissance art
would take the train across Australia in the spring season
wouldn't be so hung up on making good grades in college
would make more friends
would definitely live near the saguaro desert in Arizona
I could make a list that goes on and on and on. And as someone commented, most of these are still within reach. Unfortunately, far too often I see myself "locked in" to where I am and what I am doing. And I say, "Well, after Mother is gone I will do the things I really want to do." Why not today? Why wait until I am incapacitated or rich to travel? It can be done on a budget. Why wait to make good friends? Why not return to college just for the fun of it? I love to learn. I have learned about myself from your post, MM. Thank you.
I am glad you liked this post Donna.
I am fascinated by...where people want to live or travel. Tell me about the desert. What is the allure to this place?
Your list has many items I would also write...especially not hanging out with negative people. It seems like so much of life is wasted on coping with people...who don't really appreciate your time. I would much rather spend time with people who retain some positivity...and enjoy your company.
I wish I would have said more often...Is this mentally healthy for me? Whether it is...a relationship...or pursuing a dream...or whatever. My mental health is sacred and I have not treated it that way as much as I should have.
But yeah...we can still change some of these things...there is time. There is time for happiness and joy if we make that time.
Thank you Donna...for sharing so much with us. I am always inspired by what you write and live.
I think it is the dramatic lighting in the desert that attracts me. Sun comes up in a crystal clear sky and instantly the colors come alive -- my favorite colors -- red, orange, green, tan, brown, against that blue sky. Then in the evening watching dusk turn everything to a purple haze before blinking out. The stars are better in the desert, too. Not so much around to block the view.
Hi MM and all,
Every comment and intiation above is so rich. What I see coming through for each of us is we would live with hope and joy and not let disappointments cloud our perceptions. I have few regrets, but feel the effects and affect of having made some bad decisions along the way. The hardest part when thinking of the past is leaving it behind, because we are attached tightly to our memories. Each peer-son who contributed on this great topic has grown up to have a healthy stance for looking at the future. I also add my thanks for your dedication to running a wonderful dialogue here, MM.
Ric
I agree about following my heart more than my head. Not being quite so cautious as I used to be in the past (I'm learning to take more risks - better late than never!). Writing more letters in general. Dancing more. Having less of a work ethic.
But you know? I'm a big fan of living my life in such a way that I don't have regrets over what I didn't do or what I did do and mostly, I think I've managed to succeed fairly well. Yes, it means I overthink everything, but I am usually good with my decisions once they are made.
Awww...so good to see you Lene!
I feel like you live on another continent and you are only a site away.
You have a great attitude...I like the way you perceive things and...you put an order on your world which works for you and is healthy for you. I learn a lot from you friend.
Thank you so much for coming on over and taking part in our discussion. I always love to see you here.
If I could I would spend more time with loved ones who are gone.
But life is for the living and I agree that I am where I need to be.
I hear you...
Me too.
It is so hard when people are gone from our lives. I try to make sure the people I care about know...how I feel about them because you never know. I tell my teen son I love him before he goes to school each day. I have for years now. He probably thinks it is silly but...it makes me feel good.
Thanks so much for commenting. I hope you are doing well.
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* not sign separation agreement
* listen to my instincts more
* not care what other people think
* sing more to my kids-persue career
* finish college
* dance more
Hi Pamela
This is a lovely list.
Is there anything on here...you could still do?
I think every once in awhile I am going to create a new list just to remind myself of what is important.
Thanks so much for sharing in our discussion.