The 5 Worst Things A Therapist Can Say or Do

Merely Me Health Guide January 24, 2012
  • Many of us who live with and/or suffer from depression have sought the services of a mental health professional or therapist to ease the pain of depression.  Sometimes you hit the therapist jack-pot and find someone who not only suits your personality but is also effective at helping you to reac...

28 Comments
  • knightronin1
    Nov. 13, 2014
    I have had so many bad experiences with therapists that I can't possibly name one, but number 3 was most certainly one I could relate to. When you feel the need to ask your therapist, "So what are you thinking?" or "So what do you think about that?" that's definitely a red flag. Those are questions your therapist needs to be asking you, not the other way around....
    RHMLucky777
    Read More
    I have had so many bad experiences with therapists that I can't possibly name one, but number 3 was most certainly one I could relate to. When you feel the need to ask your therapist, "So what are you thinking?" or "So what do you think about that?" that's definitely a red flag. Those are questions your therapist needs to be asking you, not the other way around. After a string of dead ends I hit the therapy jackpot when I went to university and utilized the counseling services at the university, but outside of that my experiences with therapy (and I saw pretty much every brand of therapist out there) were pretty crumby. I always tell people to make the most of a really good therapist because experience has taught me that they are actually few and far between. Here's one little catch phrase I heard more than once from more than one different therapist. On a few occasions I resisted taking anti depressants and the response I got was something to the effect of... "That tells me you don't really want to get better." Seriously???? You know what that really is? That is arrogance coupled with ignorance; ignorance of popular perceptions of psychoactive medications and the arrogance to think that your client ought to just take you at your word and accept your point of view just because you're the therapist. I myself am female but the majority of positive experiences I had in therapy came from male therapists. A couple female therapists fed me that line from Gone with the Wind, "Tomorrow is another day." I lamented about the fact I kept hearing this to a male therapist and he responded by saying, "Yeah, I've been there, that's not very comforting." When the only thing that keeps you going is going to bed at an early hour, closing your eyes, and imagining the night is going to last forever and tomorrow will never come, being reminded that tomorrow is another day is really the last thing you need hear.
  • patientpatient
    Jun. 06, 2014

    I was very depressed and asked my therapist "is there hope for me". She gave me a quote from HER therapist who stated "hope is a very dangerous thing". Imagine how I felt! When I told her to qualify her statement, and that her quote made me feel even more depressed, she started backtracking with some bullshit about how reality is subjective, that it's all a...

    RHMLucky777

    Read More

    I was very depressed and asked my therapist "is there hope for me". She gave me a quote from HER therapist who stated "hope is a very dangerous thing". Imagine how I felt! When I told her to qualify her statement, and that her quote made me feel even more depressed, she started backtracking with some bullshit about how reality is subjective, that it's all a process, etc...

  • Anonymous
    WarriorWithin
    Feb. 07, 2013

    So I had been seing my "mental health professional" at the time for 3 years.  I was suffering from major, severe depression. I had lost my job and my health insurance and stopped taking my antidepressants 2 months earlier. She was aware of this. This woman watched me spiral downward for 9 months, then 2 weeks before she was to close her practice and move...

    RHMLucky777

    Read More

    So I had been seing my "mental health professional" at the time for 3 years.  I was suffering from major, severe depression. I had lost my job and my health insurance and stopped taking my antidepressants 2 months earlier. She was aware of this. This woman watched me spiral downward for 9 months, then 2 weeks before she was to close her practice and move out of state she suggested that I should go to a local hospital to "be evaluated" for medication. She said there "might" be a chance they would keep me inpaitent.  I asked her if she felt I needed to be inpaitent.  She said "No...I've seen you in a much darker place" The next day she met me at the hospital.  I wanted her there to speak with the intake person, I thought she would give valuable clincial information which would help ensure I was finally put on the right meds.  The next thing I know the decision is being made to keep me inpaitent. I was not happy or in agreement with this decision but 2 doctors made the decsion for me.  6 days later they were ready to discharge me, they contacted her for her input.  She told them NOT to release me, that if they did I would commit sucide. So I spent a total of 25 days locked in various hospitals.  3 months later when I finally tracked her down to try and understand what had happend she completely played dumb and acted like she had no idea what happend, why I was kept so long, She claimed to have only spoken to them during intake.  Which is a complete lie.  I have a copy of medical records. I know exactly what she told them, and she completely misrepresented the truth for the sole purpose of keeping me locked up because she was moving. She failed to do her job and have a plan in place for when/if she was no longer available. It was her responsiblility to transfer my case to someone else.  Time ran out so she dumped me in the hospital. This experience has totally had a negative impact on my life. I will not see another therapist ever, I will not ever put myself in a position where I could end up being put in a hospital against my will. 

     

     

  • Anonymous
    pffft whatever
    Jan. 28, 2012

    Therapists do not have to be educated to console someone, so a lot of the time these "therapists" are spewing bullshit to make themselves feel important. Get a master's degree in psychology, then I might take you seriously...

    • Donna-1
      Jan. 28, 2012

      Yes, and one of the therapists I went to actually had her doctorate in psychology.  And she still wanted to "reunite my personalities" and told me it would take years under her care.  She was one of those who "identifies" so strongly with her patient that her emotions spill out of her mouth and across her face.  Like, "Oh, darling, I am so sorrrrrry...

      RHMLucky777

      Read More

      Yes, and one of the therapists I went to actually had her doctorate in psychology.  And she still wanted to "reunite my personalities" and told me it would take years under her care.  She was one of those who "identifies" so strongly with her patient that her emotions spill out of her mouth and across her face.  Like, "Oh, darling, I am so sorrrrrry you have had to endure this but Mama Barlow is going to take care of you."  I didn't want to be "taken care of."  I wanted to get RID of all the stuff that would make other people want to take care of me.  I wanted to learn how to take care of myself.

  • Donna-1
    Jan. 25, 2012

    I was told other interesting things by therapists, too.  One said, "Oh you don't have schizophrenia, I don't know why they told you that."  At that time, 4 psychiatrists had confirmed the diagnosis.  Another said, "You have Narcissistic Personality Disorder and Asperger Syndrome."  B.S.  Another therapist told me I had Dissociative...

    RHMLucky777

    Read More

    I was told other interesting things by therapists, too.  One said, "Oh you don't have schizophrenia, I don't know why they told you that."  At that time, 4 psychiatrists had confirmed the diagnosis.  Another said, "You have Narcissistic Personality Disorder and Asperger Syndrome."  B.S.  Another therapist told me I had Dissociative Identity Disorder and would take years under her counseling to "bring your personalities together."  She retired the next year. Where do these people get their degrees and experience?  Who are their mentors?  Doesn't make sense to me.  Are they just making wild guesses?

    • Merely Me
      Health Guide
      Jan. 25, 2012

      Wow Donna

       

      You have been told every diagnosis in the book.  So...someone has to be wrong.  lol  What diagnoses do you feel fit you? 

       

      The problem with diagnoses is that they are constantly changing.  For example...they are thinking of eliminating Asperger's as a diagnosis...everything will get lumped under autism spectrum...

      RHMLucky777

      Read More

      Wow Donna

       

      You have been told every diagnosis in the book.  So...someone has to be wrong.  lol  What diagnoses do you feel fit you? 

       

      The problem with diagnoses is that they are constantly changing.  For example...they are thinking of eliminating Asperger's as a diagnosis...everything will get lumped under autism spectrum disorder.  And diagnoses are simply behavioral checklists...they are highly subjective. 

       

      You are a complex and fascinating person Donna...that is why you keep the docs guessing. 

       

      I am sorry you have had to go through such nonsense.  You deserve better.  We all deserve better.

    • Donna-1
      Jan. 25, 2012

      I know it must sound like I'm making that up...but I'm not.  Actually, two different therapists told me I had DID.  It made me worry for a while, I admit.  But then I realized I was thinking too much about diagnoses and not enough about just living life.

       

      "You are a complex and fascinating person Donna...that is why you keep the docs guessing." ...

      RHMLucky777

      Read More

      I know it must sound like I'm making that up...but I'm not.  Actually, two different therapists told me I had DID.  It made me worry for a while, I admit.  But then I realized I was thinking too much about diagnoses and not enough about just living life.

       

      "You are a complex and fascinating person Donna...that is why you keep the docs guessing."  That's a nice way of looking at it -- thank you!

    • Merely Me
      Health Guide
      Jan. 25, 2012

      Oh I know you aren't making this up Donna.  I think that there are just a lot of incompetent docs out there who want to see...what they want to see.

       

      Have you seen this article on Sybil Exposed?  Evidently this famous story about multiple personalities was found to be more about psychiatrists wanting to be famous than actual truth.

       

      There...

      RHMLucky777

      Read More

      Oh I know you aren't making this up Donna.  I think that there are just a lot of incompetent docs out there who want to see...what they want to see.

       

      Have you seen this article on Sybil Exposed?  Evidently this famous story about multiple personalities was found to be more about psychiatrists wanting to be famous than actual truth.

       

      There are some therapists who are blinded by the truth due to ambition.

       

      I am just sorry you have had to go through all these wacky docs putting labels on you. 

       

      MM

  • filmneye
    Jan. 25, 2012

    Hi All,

     

    I've had similar difficulties over the years in finding a good therapist who works for me. More often than not, for various reasons, the therapist I'd end up seeing wasn't good for me. My options have been limited in who I can see b/c I can't afford most of the therapists out there. Currently, I'm trying to find an affordable therapist I can...

    RHMLucky777

    Read More

    Hi All,

     

    I've had similar difficulties over the years in finding a good therapist who works for me. More often than not, for various reasons, the therapist I'd end up seeing wasn't good for me. My options have been limited in who I can see b/c I can't afford most of the therapists out there. Currently, I'm trying to find an affordable therapist I can see who will work for me.

     

    I'm getting help in my search from this wonderful book that I discovered last year that I'd like to recommend to this community that has a chapter devoted to "Finding Your Good Guide." The book is entitled "Unstuck: Your Guide to the Seven-Stage Journey Out of Depression" & was written by this renowned psychiatrist, James S. Gordon, MD, who himself has suffered from Depression.

    It's the 2nd Chapter in this book "Guides On the Journey" where he offers his wisdom & advice in "Finding Your Good Guide" (therapist). Here's a sampling of his words of advice:

     

    "If a prospective therapist doesn't offer and promote a sense of safety, and doesn't welcome, encourage, or at least accept, emotional connection, then I'd stay clear of her/him....The detached, medically-minded clinician, or the therapist who obscures his personality with the 'blank screen' that some psychoanalysts and other therapists adopt, may be all right for some people. But there's no reason why you have to work with such a person if that doesn't work for you. I don't find that people like this encourage my trust, so I do my best to stay away from them....

    Always trust & value your sense of who's right for you. All the credentials in the world...is worth nothing if you feel in your heart and your gut that he or she is not the right person....If someone seems and feels right, give him/her a try....you should have a sense that you are understood and that you and your Guide are engaged with each other, and with the issues that concern you. You should, most often, look forward to the sessions, to being with your Guide, and to his/her support and understanding. On the whole, you should feel better after a session, even if you've looked squarely at some of your...troubled territory of past hurt and present fears, resentments, and impulses. If your Guide doesn't meet these criteria, I suggest that you continue your search."

     

    Andrew

    • Merely Me
      Health Guide
      Jan. 25, 2012

      I agree with everything said here.  Absolutely.  The cold fish therapist doesn't do it for me either.  You have to have some sort of connection because therapy is a hard journey.  It is so important to choose the right therapist for you.  Unfortunately sometimes you don't have many choices.  My first "therapist" was a graduate...

      RHMLucky777

      Read More

      I agree with everything said here.  Absolutely.  The cold fish therapist doesn't do it for me either.  You have to have some sort of connection because therapy is a hard journey.  It is so important to choose the right therapist for you.  Unfortunately sometimes you don't have many choices.  My first "therapist" was a graduate student at the local community center in my neighborhood.  I was a teen and working at a bakery.  I paid five dollars to see her.  She wasn't good...she wasn't bad.  But it helped some just to have someone to talk to.  When you do find a "good" therapist (of course the term good is highly subjective) you really appreciate their skills.

       

      Thanks so much for sharing this book with us.  I will definitely be on the look out for it at the library or bookstore.

  • patsyg
    Jan. 24, 2012

    Merely Me,

    It's hard to pare down just to one the worst thing a therapist or psychiatrist ever did or said or didn't do to me, as I have been asking for help off and on for a long time.

     

    While in college (now called university), I saw an older professor from the Psychology Dept. for counseling.  I think he was the first one I ever talked to about...

    RHMLucky777

    Read More

    Merely Me,

    It's hard to pare down just to one the worst thing a therapist or psychiatrist ever did or said or didn't do to me, as I have been asking for help off and on for a long time.

     

    While in college (now called university), I saw an older professor from the Psychology Dept. for counseling.  I think he was the first one I ever talked to about my dad sexually abusing me.  After the session, my first and only with him, he HUGGED me!!!!! Without asking if it was okay!  Yuk!!

     

    About twenty years later I tried group therapy, which was led by two female therapists.  I was very anxious and tense during these sessions, and I never really identified with other members of the group, as their situations had been so different from mine.  I left the group after a number of sessions, but before the time was up for it to be over--it was a limited duration group.  However, I chose the more outgoing woman to see for individual therapy (because of my own shyness).  Unfortunately, after a period of time I started having trust issues with her and wasn't able to express myself to her.  I went back to her later to see if we could work it out, and she kept talking about me having symptoms of Borderline Personality Disorder.  She'd qualify it by saying that people who have been abused have these symptoms.  But she repeated the term a number of time during that session and indicated that she had consulted her therapist about me.  She said she would see me with the understanding that she would refer me to another therapist if she was unable to help me.  I never went back to her.  I started seeing the other woman group leader, and she was one of the two best therapists I've ever had!

     

    One psychiatrist I saw (one time only) had a personality I didn't like.  He accused me of leaving the group therapy just at the time it would have begun to help.  He was negative throughout the session.  I told the therapist I was seeing then that I would rather be depressed as to see him again.

     

    One psychiatrist I saw for a number of years.  He'd had a good reputation for working with medications.  He liked telling jokes and seemed to have a good personality.  When my younger daughter started having signs of depression, I asked her to see him.  I referred others to him.  I took my mother to see him when she was living with me.  He liked my daughter's personality and joked with her rather than addressing her abandonment issues with her father.  I was paying him out of my pocket for him to see her for 30 min. therapy sessions!  I had told him about my mother abusing my sister.  After he'd seen her a few times, he commented that if people saw my mother the way she was in his office they would never believe she could have done the things I said!  The last straw was when I told him I was having suicidal thoughts.  He asked me no questions, made no comments, and did not even look up from making his notes on his laptop computer!  I took that to mean he didn't care and never returned.

    patsy

     

    • filmneye
      Jan. 25, 2012

      Hi Patsy,

       

      I've had similar difficulties over the years in finding a good therapist who works for me. More often than not, for various reasons, the therapist I'd end up seeing wasn't good for me. My options have been limited in who I can see b/c I can't afford most of the therapists out there. Currently, I'm trying to find an affordable therapist I can...

      RHMLucky777

      Read More

      Hi Patsy,

       

      I've had similar difficulties over the years in finding a good therapist who works for me. More often than not, for various reasons, the therapist I'd end up seeing wasn't good for me. My options have been limited in who I can see b/c I can't afford most of the therapists out there. Currently, I'm trying to find an affordable therapist I can see who will work for me.

       

      And I'm getting help in my search from this wonderful book that I discovered last year that I'd like to recommend to you & others in this community that has a chapter devoted to "Finding Your Good Guide." The book is entitled "Unstuck: Your Guide to the Seven-Stage Journey Out of Depression" & was written by this renowned psychiatrist, James S. Gordon, MD, who himself has suffered from Depression.

      It's the 2nd Chapter in this book "Guides On the Journey" where he offers his wisdom & advice in "Finding Your Good Guide" (therapist). Here's a sampling of his words of advice:

       

      "If a prospective therapist doesn't offer and promote a sense of safety, and doesn't welcome, encourage, or at least accept, emotional connection, then I'd stay clear of her/him....The detached, medically-minded clinician, or the therapist who obscures his personality with the 'blank screen' that some psychoanalysts and other therapists adopt, may be all right for some people. But there's no reason why you have to work with such a person if that doesn't work for you. I don't find that people like this encourage my trust, so I do my best to stay away from them....Always trust & value your sense of who's right for you. All the credentials in the world...is worth nothing if you feel in your heart and your gut that he or she is not the right person....If someone seems and feels right, give him/her a try....you should have a sense that you are understood and that you and your Guide are engaged with each other, and with the issues that concern you. You should, most often, look forward to the sessions, to being with your Guide, and to his/her support and understanding. On the whole, you should feel better after a session, even if you've looked squarely at some of your...troubled territory of past hurt and present fears, resentments, and impulses. If your Guide doesn't meet these criteria, I suggest that you continue your search."

       

      Andrew

    • patsyg
      Jan. 25, 2012

      Andrew,

      Thank you for sharing your experiences and especially for recommending the book that contains the chapter on choosing a good therapist.  I appreciate what was said in the quote you included.  I'll probably try to get a copy of the book so that I can also benefit from what Dr. Gordon has written about depression, as well as good guides.

       ...

      RHMLucky777

      Read More

      Andrew,

      Thank you for sharing your experiences and especially for recommending the book that contains the chapter on choosing a good therapist.  I appreciate what was said in the quote you included.  I'll probably try to get a copy of the book so that I can also benefit from what Dr. Gordon has written about depression, as well as good guides.

       

      Thank you so much!

      patsy

    • Rena
      Feb. 08, 2012

      Great advice.  I'm going to check out the book as well.  Thanks.

    • dewalt.17
      Jan. 25, 2012

      Hello Patsy,

       

      I can completely empathize with your situation, people in general seem to be cold, insensative.  The world we live in today is so desenesized especially medical and mental health "professionals"  In my experience I drive 45 min. for a session or med review and between the therapist and psychiatrist she is flighty and I always have...

      RHMLucky777

      Read More

      Hello Patsy,

       

      I can completely empathize with your situation, people in general seem to be cold, insensative.  The world we live in today is so desenesized especially medical and mental health "professionals"  In my experience I drive 45 min. for a session or med review and between the therapist and psychiatrist she is flighty and I always have to remind her of issues, the psychiatrist sits and files his nails or looks around as if I am an inconvenience.  I know they are carrying heavy case loads, but that isn't my fault, they chose that field and when I'm there it's my time.

      Good luck finding the proper help.

       

      dewalt

    • patsyg
      Jan. 25, 2012

      Hi Dewalt,

      I'm sorry that the people you are seeing for help show so little concern for you.  I would like to think there might be better options for you somewhere else.  I live in a place where there are other options, and I tend to try to find someone else who does show concern, if it's not working for me.  Thanks for sharing your situation,...

      RHMLucky777

      Read More

      Hi Dewalt,

      I'm sorry that the people you are seeing for help show so little concern for you.  I would like to think there might be better options for you somewhere else.  I live in a place where there are other options, and I tend to try to find someone else who does show concern, if it's not working for me.  Thanks for sharing your situation, and I sincerely hope that you will find an improved situation as time goes by!

      patsy

    • Merely Me
      Health Guide
      Jan. 25, 2012

      Hi Patsy and all!

       

      You really have had quite a variety of therapists.  You would think this would be a relatively easy process to find a therapist or counselor but it is not.  I agree with Andrew that you really do have to trust your gut.  I always like to give people the benefit of the doubt for the time being and go for at least four...

      RHMLucky777

      Read More

      Hi Patsy and all!

       

      You really have had quite a variety of therapists.  You would think this would be a relatively easy process to find a therapist or counselor but it is not.  I agree with Andrew that you really do have to trust your gut.  I always like to give people the benefit of the doubt for the time being and go for at least four sessions to really ascertain whether it is going to work out or not.  Therapy is hard...you are feeling vulnerable already and then you go to this stranger you don't know...for help.  If one has any trust issues before therapy...this can also make things difficult. 

       

      That sounds like a good book...we should maybe do a post where we discuss the best books for helping with depression. 

       

      Thanks so much for sharing.

  • dewalt.17
    Jan. 24, 2012

    I have been in therapy since 2007 and before that in and out from another facility.

    My current therapist is new but have been building a repour.  The psychatrist is very arrogant and acts as though he is being inconvenienced.  I finally told him how I feel about his behavior, he didn't like it but I felt it needed to be said.  Needless to say...

    RHMLucky777

    Read More

    I have been in therapy since 2007 and before that in and out from another facility.

    My current therapist is new but have been building a repour.  The psychatrist is very arrogant and acts as though he is being inconvenienced.  I finally told him how I feel about his behavior, he didn't like it but I felt it needed to be said.  Needless to say we have an understanding and I only see him for med review.

     

    Hope all is well with you, take care and keep in touch.

     

    dewalt

    • Merely Me
      Health Guide
      Jan. 24, 2012

      You know...

       

      This seems to be a common complaint that some psychiatrists do not seem to have time for any sort of personal connection to their patients.  How can a doctor assess medications when...they have no clue as to how the invidual is doing in their everyday life?  We aren't widgets to be fixed and sent out the door.  We are human...

      RHMLucky777

      Read More

      You know...

       

      This seems to be a common complaint that some psychiatrists do not seem to have time for any sort of personal connection to their patients.  How can a doctor assess medications when...they have no clue as to how the invidual is doing in their everyday life?  We aren't widgets to be fixed and sent out the door.  We are human beings. 

       

      Our society is becoming more and more...one of alienation.  We live in a world where psychiatrists are too busy to talk to patients.  How can this be? 

       

      I do appreciate you stopping by to comment.  Hope to see you here and on our anxiety site as well.  Thanks so much. 

    • Rena
      Feb. 08, 2012

           Very brave of you.  Good job.  I hope you can find a better therapist that you can actually talk to.  My therapist has been doing this for a long time.  Maybe an older, more experienced/seasoned therapist would help.  You and Donna seem to have not had good experience with these "new guys".  I don't know...

      RHMLucky777

      Read More

           Very brave of you.  Good job.  I hope you can find a better therapist that you can actually talk to.  My therapist has been doing this for a long time.  Maybe an older, more experienced/seasoned therapist would help.  You and Donna seem to have not had good experience with these "new guys".  I don't know about you, but new guys in any field that I have ever been involved with, are cocky, have big egos and make a LOT of dumb rooky mistakes.

           I work in research and development in nuclear power and the new guys/gals are called, "FNG's", which loving stands for "F****** New Guys" antd it sounds like you and Donna's therapists fit right into the "FNG's" category.  They need some time to learn from the school of hard knocks and get knocked off their "high horses" and check those huge egos at the door!

  • Donna-1
    Jan. 24, 2012

    I initially went into therapy because my first psychiatrist just told me he was going to be my therapist, too.  Bad idea.  He was fresh out of medical school and extremely intimidated if I ever said the word "suicidal thoughts".  In fact, after I told him about the third time that I wanted to kill myself he had the police pick me up at work and...

    RHMLucky777

    Read More

    I initially went into therapy because my first psychiatrist just told me he was going to be my therapist, too.  Bad idea.  He was fresh out of medical school and extremely intimidated if I ever said the word "suicidal thoughts".  In fact, after I told him about the third time that I wanted to kill myself he had the police pick me up at work and take me to Parkland Hospital in Dallas (you may have heard of it) and leave me in the psychiatric ICU unit.  In a few minutes he came along to Parkland where he was an attending physician and screamed at me that he never wanted to see me again and hoped I would be put in a state hospital and never let out!  Needless to say, I never saw him again and he scared the sh*t out of me!

    • Merely Me
      Health Guide
      Jan. 24, 2012

      Oh my lord!

       

      He said this to you in public in a hospital?  what???

       

      I would be afraid too.  Just what you need...someone yelling at you. 

       

      I take it you never saw this person again.  :>)

       

      Sorry this happened Donna.  That must have been very traumatizing for you.

       

      Thanks for sharing your story here.

    • Donna-1
      Jan. 24, 2012

      I had another doctor tell me much the same thing, only in a kind and controlled manner with my parents in the room.  He said, "Mr. and Mrs. C -- there is nothing else that can be done for your daughter.  Donna's therapist and myself agree that she should be admitted to a state hospital so you can go on with your life."

       

      Now whenever someone...

      RHMLucky777

      Read More

      I had another doctor tell me much the same thing, only in a kind and controlled manner with my parents in the room.  He said, "Mr. and Mrs. C -- there is nothing else that can be done for your daughter.  Donna's therapist and myself agree that she should be admitted to a state hospital so you can go on with your life."

       

      Now whenever someone says, "YOU?  How could YOU have ever been depressed?" my mind wanders back to those dark days contemplating some dismal green-walled state hospital.  A friend had told me he was there for a while and they just wash, dry and dump everyone's clothes in the middle of the floor and you have to dig through it and see if you can find something that fits!  Not my idea of a place to get well.

    • Merely Me
      Health Guide
      Jan. 24, 2012

      Geez...

       

      talk about dehumanizing.

       

      I don't have any fond memories of my mother's many times in mental hospitals.  It was like she was a criminal. 

       

      I am sorry this happened to you Donna.  You really have survived so much...things that would broken the spirit of so many others.

       

      We are glad you are here.

    • Rena
      Feb. 08, 2012

           Oh Donna.  That is horrible.  I would have been scared to death too.  This guy was a nut case.  He's the one that can't control himself, has agressive behavior and needs to be put in a hospital. 

           I am so sorry that happened to you.  I hope you have found a better therapist now. ...

      RHMLucky777

      Read More

           Oh Donna.  That is horrible.  I would have been scared to death too.  This guy was a nut case.  He's the one that can't control himself, has agressive behavior and needs to be put in a hospital. 

           I am so sorry that happened to you.  I hope you have found a better therapist now.  Peace and Love,  Rena

  • Judy
    Jan. 24, 2012

    After 5 years of therapy, my former therapist basically told me that I would probably never be any better and that I had a spiritual void so we should therefore call it a day.  She called me later that evening and said that she didn't mean it was my fault - gee, that really helped.  About a week later, I called her and said that I didn't feel...

    RHMLucky777

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    After 5 years of therapy, my former therapist basically told me that I would probably never be any better and that I had a spiritual void so we should therefore call it a day.  She called me later that evening and said that she didn't mean it was my fault - gee, that really helped.  About a week later, I called her and said that I didn't feel comfortable ever running into her at the clinic (where I went to see my psychiatrist) and she said that it sounded like I was angry and so I should come in and talk about it.  I did, where she admitted that she hadn't handled that very well, then said I should come back in two weeks, as if it had never happened.  I actually kept going for another year but was also seeing someone else for hypnosis, my current therapist, who eventually helped me realize how much this person was actually making things worse for me.  I am so grateful that I was able to get out of that, but when you don't have a lot of experience and you feel desperate, it's hard to think about starting over with someone else - who might be even worse!  At least I already had a good person to work with in place; some angel was watching out for me.

    • Merely Me
      Health Guide
      Jan. 24, 2012

      Huh?

       

      She told you that you would probably never get better and that you had a spiritual void?  I would be like..."void this!"  lol  That is so...inappropriate.  And just plain wrong.  Even if she felt like you were not progressing in some way...she should have offered that you see someone else or...made some plan to help you...

      RHMLucky777

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      Huh?

       

      She told you that you would probably never get better and that you had a spiritual void?  I would be like..."void this!"  lol  That is so...inappropriate.  And just plain wrong.  Even if she felt like you were not progressing in some way...she should have offered that you see someone else or...made some plan to help you to move on. 

       

      Sad but true...some therapists can make the situation worse.  There are great variations in the skill of a therapist.  But we have to realize too...they are human...they make mistakes.  But it doesn't mean we have to keep seeing them.  As consumers...we have a choice.

       

      Thanks for sharing your story Judy.  I am glad you have someone really good now.  That must help a lot.

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