When my eldest son told me he had bought a movie he wanted me to see I had expected some action film or comedy.  So I was very curious when he wanted to watch the movie, "The Pursuit of Happyness" with me.  This 2006 movie stars Will Smith who plays "Christopher Gardner," a man who is down on his luck in all aspects of his life.  When his door to door salesman job of selling "bone density scanners" to hospitals doesn't pay the bills, his girlfriend leaves him to go to New York.  Gardner pleads with his girlfriend that he can keep their five year old son, Christopher with him.  She relents and father and son struggle to survive.   Based on a true story, this film depicts Chris Gardner's pursuit of a dream to become a stockbroker while living in and out of homeless shelters with his young son. 

This film is more than about happiness, it is about overcoming life obstacles in order to achieve it. 

The one quote from this movie which rang loud and clear for me was when Christopher Gardner talks about what happiness means to him:

"It was right then that I started thinking about Thomas Jefferson on the Declaration of Independence and the part about our right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. And I remember thinking how did he know to put the pursuit part in there? That maybe happiness is something that we can only pursue and maybe we can actually never have it. No matter what. How did he know that?"

When this movie ended I could not help myself.  I began to sob.  I totally broke down in front of my son.   This movie was very close to home for me.  I could relate to both the little boy and the father.  I have not talked very much about my childhood nor about my personal struggles with my son but whatever I told him, he remembered.  Watching this movie with him was a bonding experience which required no words.  I know now that he understands.

The thing is anyone can tell you things like "Don't give up" or "Follow your dreams" but they are empty platitudes without meaning unless you see the person's struggle behind the words.  When we see how someone can not only survive but also attain their dream, we take notice.  If someone can attain their dream with overwhelming hardship then maybe we have a chance too. 

When this movie showed scenes of father and son waiting in line to get into a homeless shelter, I felt a deep wound open up.  Much like the boy in this film I am five years old again.  I am in a police car being driven to a shelter.  But unlike the movie, my parent is not with me.  She would go on, alone, to a mental hospital. 

This scenario would repeat for most of my childhood and teen years.  My mother would have a mental breakdown due to her schizophrenia and the authorities would have to figure out what to do with me.  My mother and I were like gypsies.  We would move constantly and dramatically (often after my mother would do something "crazy" in the community and someone would call the cops and have her taken away in a paddy wagon) and I would have to leave my home and possessions behind, sometimes even my pets.  By the time I was a teen I would live on my own when my mother went to the hospital.  I understood how to survive when everything was taken away.  I embraced the notion that you can begin again because, quite frankly, I was forced into it.  I had no choice but to start life over in new home, a new school, or a new neighborhood.