Hi everyone. This is Andrea again. I am not sure what to put today, but i feel like i need to talk. With my issues it is such a struggle not to want to just crawl in my bed and hide. AS I have said before, I have been diagnosed with Bipolar II / Mania, severe depression, Panic Disorder, and PTSD. Now we have found that the medication (lamictal) that i am taking is causing additional problems along with these others. Causing hallucinations and voices, and I feel like i am going crazy. I just want the confusion, anxiety, and depression to STOP. I want to be able to function on a normal level....yeah i know what is that...I am talking about getting back to how i was before i used....I was strong, knew what i wanted, took care of myself and others, and was always the first to step up to help take care of something for my family members. I am just lost in an abyss of nothingness and very raw feelings. I know that I have to give it up to god, it is imperative. Any way, my concentration level is next to nothing. I can't sit still for no more than 5 minutes or so, and can't seem to keep my mind in one spot as well. So i am going to close for now. Maybe i will post something when i am having a good day...but haven't had one of those yet. Thanks every one.




You just remember this is not your fault, not your wish to be where you are. Wipe the guilt away; there should be none.
You know where you were, it was a place you did not choose to leave, it is where you want to return. All we can do is listen to you, encourage you, give you any ideas we have, as you can give us, and hope your doctors can bring you back to what was. Just don't give up, there is no place worse to be. Even five minutes of sitting with friends and family is better than having none.
Just give them what you can, keep trying, they need that as much as you.